Lois in this game is exactly that kind of horny neighbor your parents warned you about and you still went to her house anyway. She’s already bored of Peter, already wet for Donna, and the game just throws you right into that mess. No slow build, no “romantic setup,” she’s grinding on Donna on the couch, tits practically falling out, kissing like they’ve been doing this every Thursday for a year. Donna’s hands are all over her ass, Lois is moaning way too loud for someone whose husband could walk in any second, and you’re sitting there clicking through like “yeah, this is absolutely going to blow up, please continue.” When Lois drops to her knees between Donna’s thighs and they give her that smug lesbian smile, it feels way more filthy than it has any right to be, because it’s not shy at all. Tongues everywhere, Lois’ lipstick smeared, Donna pulling her red hair like she’s trying to ride her face, and you’re just watching the whole thing like some weird spiritual advisor of bad decisions. You click the next scene and suddenly the camera angle is tighter than your last relationship, right on Donna’s pussy, Lois’ nose buried in it, and you can literally feel how much the game wants you to stare. It’s not subtle. Thank god.

Then Peter gets involved. Kind of. He’s outside, pissed off, door locked, totally clueless in that perfect cartoon-husband way. He’s knocking, shouting, you know he’d lose his shit if he saw Lois with Donna, but inside the house she just keeps going. At one point Lois pauses, turns her head like she heard something, and the game gives you this tiny choice that made me laugh way too much: tell her to keep licking or tell her to go open the door. Obviously I told her to pretend she didn’t hear anything and she just shrugs it off and goes back to Donna’s clit like, “whatever, he’ll live.” That one little moment made her feel extra mean and extra hot, because she chooses pussy over Peter without a single guilty thought. And right when you think it’s just going to stay a lesbian thing, Quagmire gets called in. Of course. The way the game presents him is perfect: you see his big cock before you properly see him. He shows up like it’s a casual Tuesday, drops his pants, and suddenly the whole vibe goes from “forbidden girls-only fun” to “okay, there’s a huge dick here and someone is getting stuffed.” The first time he slides in, the game is very honest about it: Lois is stretched, her moan changes, Donna’s face goes from calm to hungry, and it leans into that interracial vibe hard without pretending it’s anything but filthy. Peter’s still out there begging to be let in while his wife is bent over the couch getting pumped full and Donna is kissing her, one hand on Lois’ breast, the other guiding that big black cock deeper. It’s shameless, slightly stupid, and exactly the kind of horny comedy that fits this world even when it absolutely shouldn’t. I do wish there was a little more control over the scene pacing, maybe a way to hold the camera longer on Lois’ face when the cumshot hits her, because when Quagmire finally blows all over her and Donna, the game kind of rushes it, like it’s scared to let you enjoy the mess. But also I replayed that part three times, so maybe it’s fine.

Portal with tits. That is pretty much the pitch here, just with way more cum and way less science. You get this redhead, Diva Mizuki, who is clearly used to being on a stage, not in some cold testing facility, and suddenly she’s stuck in a puzzle maze where the main tool is a freaking sperm gun. And it’s not subtle. The whole thing plays like someone looked at Portal’s clean white chambers and said, “yeah, but what if those surfaces were for shooting loads instead of portals?” First level drops you in a tiny room, tutorial vibes, and right away you’re firing sticky white shots at walls and platforms, trying to figure out what counts as “interactive”. The first time I accidentally hit her tits instead of the floor and the game actually reacts to it, I kinda laughed, kinda rewound, kinda did it again. She grabs her boobs, lifts them a bit, gets them glazed, and you realize ok, this is the real focus, not the puzzle. The controls are simple enough: aim, shoot, watch fluids go everywhere, repeat. There’s a “find all uses” thing going on, so half the fun is just breaking the level by testing what the gun sticks to: walls, buttons, doors, her mouth, between her tits, under her, on those floating platforms that look weirdly familiar if you ever played too much Valve stuff on Steam. Sometimes you’re just lining things up so she can run through a portal and smack her big chest right into some trigger plate, and other times you’re lining things up so her cleavage gets painted from below. Same motion, very different goal.

By the time you hit the middle levels it stops pretending it’s about escaping the test chambers and becomes straight-up “how many ways can we fuck Mizuki with this one gimmick.” There’s this one stage where you have to bounce cum shots between two portals to splatter her face from the wrong side of the room, and if you’re even a bit off, it lands on the floor and she makes this annoyed little sound that somehow made me more determined than any game over screen. Another level sets you up with a kind of titty fuck puzzle: you need her to kneel near a pressure pad, but she only moves there after you drench her chest enough that the game flags it as “scene unlocked.” So you’re standing on this catwalk, trying to arc your shots exactly into the gap of her cleavage, watching the physics do this weird half-real, half-cartoon drip. It’s stupidly satisfying and also kinda janky, like sometimes the cum just clips into her boobs or flies off at a random angle like it hit invisible wind. I got annoyed for a second because the reload sound on the gun is this squishy pop that started to drive me crazy after repeating a level, but then I got distracted by how she moans differently when you slime her ass versus her tits and forgot what I was mad about. Honestly, she acts exactly like a spoiled idol who suddenly found out science labs can be horny: pouting when you miss a shot, bragging when you “fill” a target, occasionally licking the barrel in a way that would get the original Portal banned from every school computer. It’s parody, sure, but also not really pretending to be more than: walk, aim, shoot cum, open doors, fuck the redhead with physics. And somehow that’s enough.

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