You wake up in Rick’s garage, half hungover, pants around your ankles, and he just shrugs and opens some glitchy portal that looks like he coded it while drunk on cheap vodka. Next second you’re dumped into this fucked up version of their universe where everything is familiar but just a bit too wet, too soft, too shiny. The first thing you see is Beth’s ass in yoga pants, bent over the kitchen counter, arguing with nobody because Jerry doesn’t exist here. Or he exists but not as a man. You, apparently, are the stand‑in loser. This world is stacked with huge tits and thick asses walking around like it’s normal, and you’re somehow the only guy with working dick, but the joke is you’re broke, useless and everyone treats you like background noise until you prove you can do more than jerk off in the bathroom.

The game plays like somebody smashed an rpg with a horny sandbox and forgot to clean up the code. You wander around the Smith house, sometimes the dialogue hits, sometimes it looks like the dev wrote it on a bus. Beth flips from “responsible doctor mom” to “thirsty milf ready to ride your face” depending on your choices, and it’s messy in a good way. First time she dragged me into the garage and climbed on top, the camera bugged and her tits clipped into my forehead, looked like I was getting smothered by two balloons full of milk. Still hot, though. Summer is worse and better at same time. She acts like she’s too cool for you, glued to her phone, calling you creepy stepdad, then suddenly there’s this event where she’s stuck doing squats in these tiny booty shorts and if you picked the right options earlier she just casually spreads her legs on your lap like that’s normal family bonding. There’s a mini “quest” where you have to grind a bit of cash from random odd jobs, then blow it all in one night at some sketchy bar because a cop with big tits promises “special treatment” in the bathroom stall and then crashes the scene halfway when the wrong variable triggers. I had her talking like Beth for one line. I laughed way too hard.

What I liked is how dirty some scenes are without pretending to be romantic. Vaginal stuff is front and center, no ten‑minute build up, you can just end up balls‑deep in Beth on the couch while the TV shows some static cartoon and the UI text overlaps the cum animation. Sometimes you get stuck in this loop where you’re grinding affection points and money at same time and it feels like a shitty mobile game you secretly enjoy on the toilet. Sometimes the pacing just breaks and you go from jerked‑off loser to pussy magnet in two choices. It’s not stable, not clean, the porn logic is dumb, and the whole “nut your way home” thing already doesn’t make sense five minutes in, but when Summer is riding you in her messy room with her big tits bouncing and the game forgets to fade out the footsteps sound from the hallway, you kinda stop caring that half of it feels like a bug report waiting to happen.

It starts messy, in the best possible way. You’re tossed into this warped version of the galaxy far, far away - not the kind that smells like burnt metal and destiny, but one thick with sweat and bad decisions. The whole thing feels like a fever dream that someone spun out after one too many Holonet smut threads. You’re the guy who somehow made it to Jedi Knight while everyone else got distracted by the war or by each other’s asses (and they’re massive here, holy hell). Half the time you forget why you’re supposed to be saving anything because Barriss bends forward mid-dialogue and the robe just... doesn’t hold. Then there’s Aayla, all cool confidence until her mouth opens, breathing hard like she’s half-daring you to break the code. They all do that. Even Padme - who says words about diplomacy but arches her back every time your name drops. It’s ridiculous and hot at once, like watching porn on mute during a political debate.

The turn-based fights almost feel like foreplay. Every encounter teases longer than necessary, camera angles doing that thing where you can’t tell if you’re fighting monsters or auditioning them for something darker. When Bo-Katan shows up, the whole tempo changes - less talk, more bite - and suddenly the lightsaber doesn’t look like a weapon anymore. My favorite stupid detail: in the menu, somebody coded a “meditation” button that just leads to sex scenes. Lazy? Sure. But it fits. Nothing here pretends to be noble; it’s all dirty Jedi business in slow motion. And when the game finally pops one of those creampie endings, you don’t even blink. You just chuckle, fix the screen ratio on your phone, and keep pressing through because apparently defeat can look like victory if the moaning syncs just right.

Weird thing is - somewhere between the teasing and the parody nonsense - it stops feeling like a joke. You catch yourself liking these twisted versions more than the real ones. Maybe that’s the Force talking. Or just the fact that the writing knows exactly how low you’ll sink for another glimpse under a Jedi robe.

Imagine waking up and realizing every stupid horny joke you made about “yeah I’d totally smash that mon” actually became your new life. That is literally the whole vibe here, and somehow it works way better than it should. You are this reincarnated guy in a world that kind of looks like the usual pocket monster thing, except everyone around you is either stacked like a hentai doujin or has curves that make zero sense biologically. The game just shrugs and says “yeah, you’re here to fuck, not to ask questions,” and throws you at girls and monster girls like you’re some walking breeding item. One moment you’re pretending to be a serious trainer talking with Nemona about battles, next moment she’s grinding on you and asking if your “move” is super effective while she rides you raw and begs for a creampie like it’s part of the gym rules. It’s really dumb. I love it.

The best part for me is how it treats all the famous girls as if they’ve been waiting for you personally. Misty showing up all smug, doing that fake tsundere “I’m only doing this for training” while she’s on her knees, stroking your cock with both hands and licking the tip like she’s taste testing a potion. Marnie being all quiet but then suddenly sitting on your face, thighs trembling, whispering nasty stuff that would break canon so hard. Hilda teasing you nonstop, riding your lap and pushing her tits together for a slow titfuck, with this lazy smile like she knows you’ve memorized every frame already. Sonia pretending she cares about “research” while taking off her coat and letting her big ass bounce on your cock, all animated, soft jiggle, clapping sound in your headphones, you know the drill. The models actually look like twisted versions of their originals, not ugly knockoffs, which is rare in these parody things. And the monster girls… yeah. Gardevoir giving this gentle blowjob like she’s worshiping you, then pulling you deep inside her and asking you not to pull out. Mewscarada acting all smug, rubbing her pussy on your shaft first, like “prove you can handle me,” then moaning like crazy once you slam into her. Lopunny is just straight-up fetish fuel, there is no other way to describe it. The game knows exactly what it’s doing and doesn’t pretend otherwise.

What surprised me is how often I opened this on mobile “just to check something” and ended up stuck watching one animation ten times in a row like some idiot, because there is always one little movement I missed. Jessie’s blowjob scene where her lipstick smears a bit and she strokes you faster with that annoyed Team Rocket face? Peak. Nemona jerking you off while ranting about battle stats, using spit as lube and then suddenly pressing your dick between her tits like she remembered titfucks exist mid-scene. There is some actual voyeur stuff too, where you’re hiding behind bushes watching a milf trainer finger herself while her mon watches, and your stupid horny brain is like “okay but when is my turn,” and yes, of course the game gives you that. Sometimes the pacing is weird, like it jumps from teasing to full vaginal in one click and the dialogue barely catches up, but somehow that chaotic energy kinda fits. I had one moment where I was going through a “serious” talk with a character and I clicked the wrong option and suddenly she was on her knees giving me a handjob, zero lead-up, and I laughed so hard I had to pause the scene. But then I watched it twice anyway. The adventure stuff is just an excuse to move you from one girl or monster girl to the next, and honestly I stopped pretending it was about anything else after the first time I pumped a full load inside Sonia and she smiled like that was the secret objective all along.

Everything in this game feels like someone took the “wizard school after the war” idea, then slowly twisted it with horny fingers, one scene at a time. You play as this guy who survived the big final battle, and suddenly you’re thrown back into school life, but it’s not really school like you remember from the books. The tone is quieter, heavier, very “post-war hangover”, with ghosts of trauma in the background, and also a lot of naked people in corridors. What hooked me is how slow it starts: long conversations in dim classrooms, walking around the castle, the sense that characters actually lived through shit. They’re tired, bitter, horny, lonely. I like that kind of pacing: you don’t just click twice and boom, blowjob. Sometimes you’re stuck in a talk with Hermione about ethics of rewriting fate, and you can feel she’s half grieving, half curious how far she can push her own limits. It’s hot in such a weird, broken way. And then the next moment she’s on her knees under a library table, and you’re trying not to laugh because the game doesn’t even pretend to be subtle.

The fantasy side goes pretty wild, but in a way that still feels grounded in that “magic school with rules” thing. You get these scenes where elven girls show up as part of some rebuilding exchange program, all proud and formal, talking about treaties, then you click through a few choices and suddenly an elf is jerking you off in a dusty storage room while arguing about wand regulations. There’s a tentacle bit too, of course there is, and I kind of hate that I enjoyed it. It’s not just monster porn thrown at your face. There’s this old forbidden spell experiment under the school, drifting and half-alive, and when it finally touches one of the girls, the writing slows down like it’s describing an unwanted memory that slowly turns into desire. Her clothes peel away like they’re losing a fight, she gets pinned wide open, slick and breathing fast, and the protagonist is both turned on and terrified. It’s fucked up, but not cheap. Then again, sometimes the game feels cheap, like when a serious moment about loss turns into instant tits-out stripping minigame and weirdly clunky blowjob animation. I still replayed that scene three times, so clearly I’m not innocent here. What I keep coming back to is the world-building: the dorm gossip about who fucked a “reformed” dark creature in the forest, staff meetings that hint at old grudges, Hermione pretending to be above it all while letting you slide your hand between her thighs during a “study session”, her voice cracking when you finally push inside her on that creaky classroom desk. The art is rough in places, some faces look a bit off, but somehow that makes the filthier scenes even nastier, like fan art that went too far and never looked back. It’s romantic and soft and disgusting and sweet and stupid, all at the same time, and I keep telling myself I’m here for the time travel plot when I’m clearly staying for the way she moans around your cock during a sloppy blowjob behind a half-broken statue of the founder.