You’re the poor bastard who climbed the ladder just high enough that nobody shoots you, but everybody dumps their shit on your desk. Whole galaxy is rotting, planets choking on smog, priests screaming about purity, and you’re in a cramped office where the lights buzz like insects while you decide if some mining colony gets air filters or “thoughts and prayers.” And right in the middle of that, you keep tripping over women who want to fuck you, argue with you, manipulate you, or all three at once. Not because you’re some chosen hero, but because your signature can save their lives or destroy their whole world, and in this empire, pussy is just another kind of paperwork.

You start as this awkward virgin clerk who suddenly has real power, and the game never lets you forget how weird that is. One moment you’re reading a report about famine on a frozen shithole planet, next moment a bored noble MILF is sitting too close on your couch, pretending she’s worried about “trade quotas” while her hand creeps up your thigh. She’s old enough to have kids in the guard, tits poured into some ridiculous formal dress, and she’s treating your office like it’s a private bedroom. You can push her away and grill her about corruption, or you grab her hair and she drops on her knees between your legs and starts sucking like this is the only way she remembers how to negotiate. The game is blunt about it: she wants a better result on your decision, and she’s ready to slobber on your cock for it, lipstick smeared, eyes watering, trying to moan around your dick while you skim her file. And it’s fucked up, because while she’s gagging on you, you’re also actually reading the numbers and thinking, “yeah, this planet is screwed.”

That’s kind of how the whole thing feels: serious and horny at the same time, like someone mashed a grim sci fi bureaucracy sim with a porn VN and just didn’t apologize. There’s this cute junior scribe who brings you data slates and looks like she’s gonna burst from stress, and if you’re gentle, she slowly cracks, starts opening up about how terrified she is of getting reassigned to some nightmare warzone. First time you manage to calm her down, she leaves… but if you keep backing her, she eventually turns up in your room, shutting the door, cheeks red, hands shaking as she offers herself like she’s filing a desperate last-minute request. She’s still technically the one begging, but you KNOW the power is in your hands when she climbs into your lap and whispers that she’s never done this before, then winces as you push inside her, tight and wet and clinging to your shirt so hard the fabric creaks. And right after you finish, there’s this short, shitty silence, like “ok, cool, now you both work in the same office tomorrow.” No magic romance fade-out, just sticky thighs and a stack of forms on the desk you still have to sign.

What caught me was how your traits twist those scenes. Pick paranoid and you’re double-checking everyone, even when some guardwoman with arms thicker than your waist is riding your dick in a barracks bunk, using you like a toy because she’s lonely and half drunk, and your brain is still going “is she trying to get a transfer out of that meat grinder of a front line?” Go empath and it actually stings when a woman offers her body like it’s the last thing she has left to bargain with. You can still grab her by the hips and fuck her raw over your office table, her moans mixing with the quiet hum of cogitators, but it hits different when you realize her whole world literally hangs on the word you’re going to stamp on that form after you pull out and she’s dripping on your paperwork. The art has that rough AI feel sometimes, but every now and then a scene lands just right: a milf with tired eyes but a hungry mouth, a scared virgin biting her lip while you push in slowly, a smirking manipulator who’s clearly enjoying the game more than you are. It’s messy, it’s not “nice,” and it leans into the idea that in this empire, romance, lust, fear, and red tape are all the same fucking language. Dare to play it alone, or invite company?

According to Sofia feels like reading someone’s horny diary while drunk, where every second page is a new excuse for why “this doesn’t count as cheating”. You’re basically hanging inside Sofia’s head while she lives with Bob, swears she loves him, and then spends the whole game bending the idea of loyalty like it’s a yoga class for her morals. She’s this bubbly blonde who acts dumb on purpose, but she’s not dumb, she’s just really good at pretending rules are optional if the dick is big enough or the dare sounds fun. One moment she’s cuddling Bob on the couch, promising she’d never hurt him, and the next she’s at some party letting a stranger draw on her boobs with a marker because “it’s just body art, like a tattoo, not sex”. The game leans into that constant mental gymnastics. You get those scenes where someone dares her to play strip poker, and she folds instantly, loses on purpose, laughs, and ends up naked on the table with guys staring at her, and she goes “Don’t worry, Bob, it’s only a game, not cheating if nobody cums… on the inside”. Yeah, the logic is that cursed.

What I liked is how the situations escalate without a big dramatic drum roll. It crawls up on you. First it’s just some flirty truth or dare, “show your panties” kind of thing. Then suddenly she’s on her knees in the bathroom during a house party, giving a messy blowjob to some dude she just met because technically “mouth stuff isn’t real sex” in her weird internal rulebook. And the game really milks the facial expressions. She has that innocent wide-eyed look while she’s swallowing, like she’s trying to convince herself and the player at the same time that this is fine, totally fine, nothing wrong here. There’s this one scene with a “backdoor only” arrangement that pretty much sums up the whole vibe. She’s drunk, straddling this guy’s lap, already half fucked, then stops and giggles, “But it can’t go in the front, that would be cheating, only the back is allowed.” And yeah, the game commits. You see everything, how her body reacts, how she tries to say no and then changes her mind mid-moan because “rules are flexible, right?” It’s filthy, sometimes stupid, sometimes actually funny in a fucked up way. She’ll finish with another guy, wipe her mouth, then go home to Bob acting like the sweetest girlfriend ever, baking something or snuggling him like she didn’t just get railed in a stairwell. I wish the game sometimes slowed down to show more of Bob’s side, his suspicions, but it kind of works that he’s this soft blur in the background while Sofia’s wild logic runs the show. It’s her world, he’s just the excuse she uses to call the whole mess “technically faithful.”

So this game basically throws you onto some magical anime girl island after you get horny and follow some chick with a fat ass - yeah that's literally the setup and honestly? It works. Don't Toy With Me is one of those sandbox harem deals where you're surrounded by every waifu you've ever jerked off to, from Hinata's massive tits to Zero Two's perfect curves. The whole thing feels like someone's wet dream made manifest, which I guess it literally is according to the dev.

The variety is insane though - you got your shy Hinata types, your bratty Nagatoro energy, thicc One Piece girls like Robin and Nami, plus a bunch of others I recognized but can't remember the names of right now. Each girl has their own little personality quirks and the interactions feel pretty natural for what they are. Like when you're chatting with Nagatoro she's actually being a teasing bitch instead of just generic anime girl #47. The sex scenes are animated which is nice, lots of titfucks and creampies and the usual stuff you'd expect. Some of the girls look a bit young but that's anime for you I guess? The ahegao faces during climax scenes are chef's kiss though.

What bugs me is the school setting feels kinda pointless - like why am I attending classes when I could be railing Yoruichi instead? But then again maybe that's the point, building up tension before you get to the good stuff. The mobile version runs smooth on my phone which is surprising since most of these games lag like hell. There's this whole mystery about how you ended up there but honestly who gives a shit when Erza Scarlett wants to fuck your brains out. The sandbox element means you can basically choose your own adventure with whoever catches your eye that day. Sometimes I wish there was more story but then Esdeath shows up and suddenly I don't care about plot anymore.

Celia’s day is already trash before the truck hits her. Classic isekai setup, but here it feels more like being yeeted out of a Discord call after saying the wrong thing in NSFW chat. She wakes up in this ridiculous fantasy world, still a lazy NEET at heart, except now there’s a smug dragon spirit living in her head and her body got “patched” in the weirdest way possible. One minute flat-chested hoodie goblin, next minute she’s futa with a magical cock that reacts way too much to teasing, fear, and honestly just light breeze. The game has fun with that. Sometimes a monster girl leans a bit too close, the screen shakes, and Celia’s “new equipment” twitches in the art like it has its own opinion. You don’t need a tutorial to understand where this is going. Dialog is like late night horny shitposting: awkward, self aware, dumb jokes about game dev and life, then suddenly someone is on their knees giving her a sloppy blowjob while the dragon spirit makes commentary like a pervy Twitch chat in her head.

What surprised me is how many scenes just spiral. You start with this goofy “pickup line” minigame, right, where you choose lines that range from smooth to absolute trainwreck. You try something semi romantic and end up with the busty milf monster girl pressing Celia’s dick between her huge tits and going to town, drool everywhere, her tongue poking out in that stupid ahegao way that would get you banned from Twitch in half a second. Pick the most cursed line and the same girl laughs, shoves Celia onto a bed, and suddenly it flips into a rough anal scene where Celia’s the one getting pinned while still jerking herself off, moaning like she’s going to break her own voice. There’s a lot of that weird double layering, where she’s fucking and getting fucked at the same time, creampies both ways, cum dripping in places the dragon spirit really doesn’t need to comment on, but does anyway. The AI CG looks like the dev fed a bot too much hentai and then just clicked “yeah, that’s good enough” and honestly it fits the tone. Monster girls with stupidly big tits, weird little details like claws around her shaft during a handjob, or a footjob scene where the girl’s toes are painted some tacky pink that somehow makes it way hotter. Sometimes the faces look a bit off, but when the futa protagonist is balls deep in some demon girl’s pussy and her belly bulges just a bit after the creampie, you’re not exactly opening Photoshop to complain. It plays smooth on mobile, too, perfect for that “just one more scene” loop where one minute you’re laughing at a meme about truck-kun and the next you’re watching Celia deepthroat a toy to “train” before she tries to swallow a monster girl’s cock in a harem scene that gets way out of hand in the best possible way.