High School DxD parody games are usually all the same: show you Rias’ tits, loop some moaning, throw a lazy blowjob scene and call it a day. This one actually tries a bit more, which is weird, because it still feels kinda trashy in a good way. You start as the usual no-luck guy at school, the type who pretends to look at his phone in the hallway just to not make eye contact, and then suddenly you’re surrounded by girls from DxD acting like your dick is the center of the universe. Rias walking up in that school uniform, leaning over the desk while pretending to talk about “club activities”, but the camera just stays on her cleavage for way too long, and before you even click anything she’s already hinting that she wants to taste you. The whole thing pushes masturbation and hand stuff pretty hard at the start, like it really wants you to work for the first blowjob, but the pacing actually helps the scenes feel hotter later, when you finally get Rossweisse or Akeno on their knees.

What I liked is how the school setting is used as a dirty background instead of some serious story. You’re technically in a classroom or club room or empty hallway most of the time, but nobody bothers pretending this is normal. Koneko sitting casually next to you in class while you try to hide your boner under the desk, the text teasing that she notices, then cut to a short animated loop of her hand sliding into your lap. It’s not some big “romance route” thing, it just happens, like a horny daydream. Same with Akeno: she starts flirty and soft, then suddenly she’s on her knees behind the lockers, drool on your shaft, looking up with that smug “I own you” face while you try not to groan too loud because, yeah, technically you’re still at school. Those little animated loops work better than I expected, they repeat, sure, but there’s enough movement in the hair, tongue, saliva, tits bouncing, that it never feels totally dead. I hate that the sound mix sometimes spikes too loud for no reason though. You lower the volume for the menu music, then the first oral scene hits and her slurping noise sounds like your speakers just turned into a porn megaphone. I keep forgetting to fix that and then it annoys me again, and then I forget I was annoyed when Akeno starts gagging enthusiastically on my cock.

Monetization is where it gets kind of shitty in a sneaky way, and I say this as someone who wastes money on horny stuff a lot. The game throws you enough free content to make you think “ok, cool, fair”, but then some routes feel half-closed unless you drop a tip on Patreon or follow their SubscribeStar. It’s not aggressive popups or anything, more like quiet pressure. Rias’ first handjob and blowjob scenes are free, but if you want the longer animated climax with extra camera angles and more dialogue, suddenly that’s “exclusive”. Same for Rossweisse, her whole strict teacher act builds up super nicely, she catches you jacking off in a side room, makes you finish with her hand while she scolds you, but you can tell there was supposed to be follow up content they locked behind “support us to unlock more”. As an ethical consumer, that feels scummy in a parody that literally rides on a big anime IP it doesn’t own. They’re already piggybacking on High School DxD’s popularity, then trying to squeeze out micro-patronage from horny fans who just want to see Rias swallow. At least don’t split one sequence into “free cum” and “premium swallow”. That’s like selling half a condom. Still, I caught myself replaying Koneko’s quiet, focused handjob scene on my phone while on break at work, using Firefox to avoid Chrome sync, worrying way more about browser history than I should. The game is rough around the edges, sometimes cringe, sometimes hot as hell, and honestly, it fits the DxD spirit too well, which is both the best and worst thing about it.

So the thing about hotel management sims is they always promise this fantasy of control but actually it's just spreadsheets right. This game, it starts with spreadsheets. Kyro is a nobody manager, the kind of guy who probably alphabetizes the minibar keys, and then this Curse God thing shows up and honestly the design is kind of a mess. It's like someone fed an AI a bunch of Naruto screenshots and forgot to tell it which character was which. But that's not the point.

The point is Tsunade's tits. There I said it. The whole thing pivots on this moment where the curse unlocks and suddenly you're groping Lady Tsunade in the hallway and the art style shifts into this weirdly glossy AI generated thing where her chest is just... physics breaking. And you think okay, this is the fantasy, the big tit milf corruption pipeline. But then Komi Shouko is there? From Komi Can't Communicate? Standing in the lobby looking anxious and the game wants you to, like, train her? It's such a bizarre crossover. Sakura's there too, and the netorare tag isn't kidding, you're actively making these women cheat on their canon partners and the game frames it as this empowering dark awakening but also it's just a series of increasingly unhinged titfuck scenes in hotel rooms.

I kept getting stuck on the buttjob mechanic. Not because it's hot, but because the positioning makes no anatomical sense. Like, the AI clearly didn't understand what it was generating. One screenshot I took has Tsunade's ass clipping through the bed frame and her expression is this dead eyed smile that's supposed to be seductive but reads as existential horror. I stared at it for way too long. The corruption meter fills up and the dialogue gets repetitive, the same phrases about "giving in" and "true desires" cycling. There's a scene with Komi in the manager's office where she's stripping and the text box glitched and just said "shy" three times. It's not good. But I kept clicking. The harem assembles without any real logic, just a collection of parody women with huge chests and the same vacant expression. The teasing minigame is literally just clicking on different body parts until a bar fills up. It's the most boring thing I've ever done with one hand. Why did I play the whole thing? The Sakura corruption route has a moment in the hotel pool that's genuinely unsettling in how the AI rendered the water reflection. I think about it sometimes.

So I’m playing this thing, right, and my first thought is who the fuck names their company Stunks Trading. Sounds like a front for selling expired cheese out of a van. But whatever, we’re the vice president, we’ve tanked the economy single handedly with bad bets, and the only fix is a shotgun wedding to some heiress. Classic. Lucy shows up looking like she stepped out of a Doris Day nightmare, all petticoats and casserole enthusiasm. The animated bits are janky in that specific way where a character’s mouth moves three seconds after the dialogue, which I live for. Pure camp.

Then the wedding night hits and surprise, bitch. That tradwife is packing more than just a killer meatloaf recipe. The whole game becomes this deliciously messy dance of choices where you’re trying to figure out if you’re horrified, turned on, or just really committed to saving your shitty import export business. The teasing scenes are where it’s at. There’s one moment where Lucy, still in the full June Cleaver getup, just gives you this look over a mixing bowl, and the tension is so thick you could frost a cake with it. The writing is horny but also weirdly sweet, like it can’t decide if it wants to be a raunchy comedy or a genuine romance route and honestly, neither can I. The lesbian tag is there but it’s more of a vibe, a side character who keeps giving my female protagonist the eyes, and I kept getting distracted trying to ditch my femboy husband for her which I’m pretty sure isn’t the main plot.

The contradictions are baked right in. One minute you’re having a heartfelt chat about gender expression over burnt cookies, the next you’re choosing dialogue options that sound like they were written by a closeted 1950s ad man having a panic attack. The gay tag feels misleading though, it’s more about a very specific femme presentation than a male/male dynamic, which bugged me for a hot second before I got distracted by a truly unhinged cooking minigame that I failed spectacularly. Never did figure out if that mattered for the ending. Probably not.

Right, so the title screen is just... there. No menu music, no fancy animation. Just a button that says start and three pairs of tits staring at you. The 3dcg models have that specific shiny skin look, like someone discovered the subsurface scattering slider and pushed it to eleven. Their proportions are absurd. We're talking beach ball territory, the kind of big tits that clip through their own arms if they move wrong. And they do move wrong, often. The animation loops are stiff, robotic almost, but somehow that adds to the whole bimbo fantasy. Like they're fuckdolls that learned to blink.

The male protagonist has no face, obviously. Just a floating cock that appears in frame when needed. First scene drops you straight into a bedroom with a blonde whose ass defies physics. The dialogue is what you'd expect. "You like what you see?" type stuff. No buildup, no story about how you got there. Just immediate access. There's a voyeurism angle with the second character, she's watching from a doorway while you creampie her friend, touching herself. The masturbation animation is a two second loop that plays about forty times. Got bored, clicked through. The oral sex segment has this weird thing where the tongue never actually touches anything, just hovers. Like a 3D render where someone forgot to check the collision meshes.

The titfuck scene though. That's where the animator clearly spent their time. The physics engine actually works there, the way the flesh deforms around the shaft. Rest of the game feels rushed in comparison. Anal sex with the third bimbo is just the vaginal animation but repositioned slightly. Lazy. The creampie visuals are just a white sphere that appears and then fades out. No dripping, no aftermath. For a game that's basically just a cum delivery system, you'd think they'd nail that part. The whole thing is maybe fifteen minutes if you read slow. No choices, no branching paths. Just click, watch, finish. The gallery mode unlocks everything after one playthrough which makes replaying pointless. Wish there was at least a sound slider because the wet noises are mixed way too loud compared to the moaning.

I keep thinking about how these browser games are basically the fast food of porn. You know what you're getting, it's not fancy, but sometimes that's exactly the point. This one, with its point and click setup, is like someone took the concept of a treasure hunt and said what if the treasure was just... fucking. You click around a room, you find a lighter or a dildo or whatever, and you hand it to a woman with an ass that defies basic anatomy. The transaction is so blunt it almost becomes a parody of itself. I respect that, I think. Or maybe I'm just tired.

The animations are 3D but in that specific way where the skin textures look like they've been oiled by a machine. There's this one scene with a character who has these absolutely massive tits, and the physics during the vaginal sex animation are so aggressive I laughed. Not in a mean way, more like a genuine surprise. The creampie finish is just... there. It happens. The game doesn't make a big deal about it, which is somehow funnier. The anal scene feels like it was added because someone on a forum demanded it, and the developer just sighed and patched it in. The oral sex bit is so brief I almost forgot it existed while writing this. The male protagonist is a silent, faceless pair of hands, which is standard. His masturbation animation at the start is a loop that goes on slightly too long, and I found myself clicking frantically to make it stop. Not because it was bad, but because the loop was so perfectly seamless it became hypnotic in a way that felt unintentional.

I'd give this game a mock award for Most Honest Transactional Sex Simulator. It doesn't pretend to be anything else. The big ass tag is doing a lot of heavy lifting here, literally. There's a moment where you give a character a random item you found, and she just bends over a table. No dialogue, no buildup. The camera just zooms in on her ass and the animation starts. It's so abrupt it circles back to being art. My only real complaint, and I'll never get over this, is why is the item for the third character hidden behind a UI element that looks like it should be clickable but isn't? I clicked a decorative plant for three minutes. Three. Minutes. The plant is not a button. The game never tells you this. It just lets you click the plant and feel stupid. I still think about that plant.

ok so i started Memories thinking it'd be a quick fap, you know? the whole "wife gets corrupted by a website" setup is my jam, like some modern netorare folklore. the 3dcg is janky in a way that loops back around to being hot, like those early illusion games but with worse lighting. there's this one scene where the wife is just on the computer, and the guy's hand slides over, and the animation is so stiff it looks like a tech demo from 2009, but the slow corruption of her expression? chef's kiss. i spent way too long on just that one detail, the way her eyes go from annoyed to... not annoyed.

the cheating angle is unapologetic. it's not "oh no, what have i done" drama, it's more like watching a car crash where the cars are genitals. the interracial scenes are... there's one with a delivery guy that made me forget what i was talking about. the groping on the train, though. why is the groping always on a train? it's a cliche but the game commits to it with this weird exhibitionism vibe, like the other passengers are just blurry blobs of judgment. the animated creampie shots are the kind of thing i'd screenshot and add to my absurd censored collection, the mosaic is so aggressive it's practically a character.

the handjob scene in the kitchen is where the male protag's passivity really shines, he just stands there like a mannequin while his wife's "memories" get rewritten. some people will hate that. i kind of loved it? no i didn't. it's infuriating. the teasing is relentless but the payoff sometimes feels like a corrupted zip file. worth it for the one specific vaginal scene where the animation loops perfectly and you forget the whole morality system is just a notebook gimmick. dare to play it alone, or invite the ghost of your past relationships?

You ever meet someone and just know you're gonna make terrible decisions? That's Rune and Devon. Two lonely guys circling each other like cats who haven't decided if they want to fight or... something else. The game doesn't try to be pretty. It's got this rough, almost sketchy art style that somehow makes everything feel more intimate, like you're looking at someone's private drawings. Not polished at all. Deliberately so, I think. And it works.

The sex, when it happens, is messy in the best way. First time Devon goes down on Rune, it's awkward and hot and there's this moment where you can practically feel Rune holding his breath. The oral scenes have this raw quality, the 2D art focusing on expressions more than anatomy sometimes. Which, honestly? More games should do that. The anal stuff comes later and it's not some perfectly choreographed thing. It's two guys figuring it out, lots of lube probably, the kind of fumbling that actual sex involves. The creampie scene... look, I've been through enough heartbreak to appreciate when a game lets a moment just sit there, messy and real, instead of cutting away.

But here's the thing. The romance. It's almost too slow? No, that's wrong. It's exactly the right pace if you've ever been burned before and now you're suspicious of anyone who's nice to you. Rune has that wall up. Devon has his own damage. They're both furry characters but that's almost incidental, the story's about trust and the terrifying possibility that someone might actually see you. The dialogue sometimes tries too hard to be meaningful and there's this one scene where they're just sitting on a dock that goes on forever. I kept clicking, waiting for something to happen. Nothing did. Maybe that was the point.

For future players: don't rush the sex scenes. The game rewards you for letting the tension build. Click slower than you want to. Let the silences between dialogue hang there. The payoff hits different when you've been holding your breath alongside them.

The cutscene where Voluptas first appears is a mess. I mean that in a good way? Her boobs clip through her own divine robes, the Honey Select 2 lighting makes her look like she's standing under a flickering fluorescent tube in a basement, and her voice lines are pure cheese. But there's something about that unpolished, almost amateurish framing that makes the whole thing work. It feels like a fever dream, not a product. The animation studio in me screams about keyframe smoothing, but the degenerate in me just clicks through to the size control power. The power is literally a slider. You meet a girl, the dialogue is what you'd expect from a translated isekai fantasy, and then you get a UI element that lets you inflate her chest like a balloon. The first time you use it on the elf girl, the mesh stretches with this weird, unnatural deformation that's honestly more fascinating than any perfectly sculpted 3DCG model. It's janky, and that jank is the whole personality.

The sandbox loop is basically nonexistent. You wander, you talk, you fuck. The masturbation scenes are oddly detailed, the camera lingering on the protagonist's hand like it's the most important character model in the game. And then, during a spanking scene with the catgirl, the sound effect just... stops. No fade, no resolution. It's a bug, obviously. But it's the kind of bug that makes you laugh and then immediately forget as the next creampie scene loads with a breast expansion animation that looks like someone's first Blender tutorial. The harem building is just a checklist, but the oral sex animations have this one specific, sloppy tongue motion that feels weirdly authentic compared to the robotic vaginal sex loops.

The whole isekai setup is just an excuse, and the game knows it. The goddess gave you the power of size control, and you use it. That's it. The romance tag is a lie, it's just a series of escalating, messy, physics defying encounters. I wish there was a DLC that added some actual tension, maybe a rival with a shrinking power, or a scene where the expansion goes wrong and you have to deal with the consequences. Something to break the monotony of the slider. The jank is charming until it isn't, and then it's just a broken sound effect during a hand job and you're staring at a static image wondering why you're still clicking.

So Tora Productions, right? The people who do those really long, slow-burn visual novels with actual character arcs. This ain't that. This is what happens when the writer gets bored while the artist is busy. It's a match-3 game. Like, Bejeweled. You're swapping gems to make lines of three while a date happens around you.

The gimmick, and I use that word lovingly, is that the puzzle board is supposed to be a metaphor for the date itself. When you're doing well, clearing the board, the conversation flows and clothes start coming off. When you get stuck, the date gets awkward. It's a cute idea that kinda falls apart the moment you actually need to focus on not failing the puzzle while a perfectly looped animation of a girl with absolutely massive tits is getting her ass fingered on the side of the screen. You have a male path and a lesbian path, which is nice, but the lesbian one feels like someone just swapped the pronouns and called it a day. The 3DCG models are... look, they're from that era, you know the one. Slightly plastic skin, hair that doesn't quite move right, but the animators knew what they were doing with the jiggle physics. I'll give them that.

The anal scene in the swinging couple's route caught me off guard, not gonna lie. You're trying to line up four blue gems and suddenly there's a close-up of a tongue going somewhere that made me drop my phone. The multiple protagonist thing is weird because you switch perspectives and it's like, wait, who am I supposed to be horny for now? The teasing parts work better than the actual sex sometimes, that little dance of the puzzle getting harder as the clothes come off. Wish there was more group stuff that wasn't locked behind perfect scores. The oral animations loop too fast, it's like watching a dog lap water. But that one match-3 power-up that clears the whole board while the character on screen has a very vocal reaction? That's good game design, I don't care what anyone says.