Lewd Piece feels like someone smashed a horny fanfic archive, a janky phone RPG, and a cosplay convention together, then sprinkled it with just enough pirate logic to pretend it all makes sense. You are “captain” in the same way Odysseus was a loyal husband: technically true, but every scene is trying to seduce you away from whatever moral compass you had. One moment you’re choosing skills like you’re in some budget Persona menu, the next moment you’re staring at Nami’s tits squeezed into a maid uniform, offering to “help with inventory” while clearly meaning your dick. The game leans hard into that trainer fantasy: you’re not just managing a ship, you’re adjusting how obedient, perverted, jealous, or teasing your crew becomes, like a horny social link chart. I had this moment with Robin where I picked a dialogue option that looked harmless, just some smart-ass joke about ancient stones, and suddenly she’s pressing her big ass into my lap in the cabin, asking if you “need a practical demonstration about friction.” The writing is not subtle. It doesn’t want to be. It has the same energy as those old hentai OVAs where they pretend to care about plot for 20 seconds, then cut to a titfuck in the engine room.

What really killed me is how the game pretends to be about treasure, but the only treasure that matters is which scene you unlock next. You get these little sandbox vibes on mobile: hopping between locations, hitting the maid cafe “disguise” event, messing with your pirate harem schedule like you’re running a very horny calendar app instead of a ship. There is combat, turn based stuff, but half of the time I’m just clicking through because I know the real prize is when Boa Hancock shows up later with a “training session” that is literally her in maid cosplay riding you and calling it a lesson in loyalty. The sci fi twist with sex robots sneaks in like a shitpost someone forgot to delete: one second it’s pirate romance, next second you’re in a hidden lab deciding breast size in a character creation menu for a robot maid who calls you “captain” while giving a handjob, eyes rolling into full ahegao. It should feel totally wrong, but in erotic games logic this is exactly right. The cheating stuff is there too, quiet but sharp: you’re promising romance to one girl, then sneaking oral sex from another behind a door while your crew walks outside. The game even leans into voyeurism with scenes where you “accidentally” spy on Nami sucking someone off in a corridor, only for the script to twist it and put you in that place next time. It’s parody, sure, of One Piece and of dating sims and of all those grand adventure stories, but it’s also very clear what the real adventure is: every choice slowly shaping a crew that exists to tease you, fuck you, and trap you in a lewd little management loop where the biggest boss fight is trying not to open the gallery again.

Guy grows up on a boring farm, shoveling shit, milking cows, watching the same hills every day, and one morning he just snaps and says “fuck this, I’m done.” That’s basically where the game starts. He walks into this new guild in town like some clueless country boy with a hard dick and big dreams, and the guild is nothing like he imagined. It’s less glorious hero hall and more horny circus, full of weirdos, stacked women and things that probably count as “monsters” on paper but end up hotter than half the humans in town. You see it all from his eyes, close and personal, like you’re the one trying not to stare at their tits when they’re pretending to explain guild rules. I failed that part, by the way. Hard.

The town itself feels like a big playground that somebody filled with quests just so you had an excuse to walk around staring at asses. It’s one of those sandboxes where you just wander, poke things, get distracted, forget the main story exists, then suddenly remember you were supposed to become a “real adventurer” and not just bang every girl with a pulse. Half the time I was going “ok, next I’m gonna do proper guild jobs” and then this busty receptionist bends over the counter and my brain just turns to pornhub suggestions. There’s that slow, teasing rhythm too: first it’s casual talk, then innuendo, then you’re back in the same spot later and the conversation is just a little dirtier, her top a little tighter, her eyes locking on your crotch like it’s part of the quest log. They really nailed that feeling of escalation where you know you’re in a harem game long before the MC figures it out. He’s always the last one to understand he’s surrounded by girls who want to jump him. You’re just watching thinking “dude, she is basically offering her pussy on a silver plate” and he’s like “wow she’s friendly.”

What really gets me is when the “monster” girls show up. First time you meet one, you half expect some goofy gimmick. Then she leans in close, you notice fangs, scales, maybe a tail swaying behind her, but your dick does not care at all. I had one scene where the MC is alone in some side area the guild barely uses, and this not-quite-human girl corners him. You can see her curves clear as day, boobs pressing against him, pupils doing that hungry thing, and she’s talking about “payment” for helping her with a tiny errand that took like two clicks. The game doesn’t rush it. There’s that slow, heavy silence where you know she’s about to make him choose between pretending he’s a good boy and letting her ride him stupid in some dusty storage room, while everyone else in the guild is just a few doors away. And because it’s from his perspective, the camera just sits right there while her hand slowly drifts down, testing him, testing you. Sometimes I wished the MC talked less and just fucked more, but then again, the teasing is part of why it hits. The world feels slightly messy, not super polished, like a shelf full of figures where some are still in the box and some already out and leaning funny, but that’s exactly the charm here: everything’s a bit imperfect, a bit off, but you still want to collect every girl, every scene, every little moment where the farm boy forgets about “goals” and just gets lost in soft skin and dangerous curves.

It’s ridiculous, really - Fry crash-lands among yellow people and the first thing I notice is how the lighting in Moe’s bar makes everyone look like melted butter. That’s not a complaint, by the way, it’s kinda hot. The game starts off pretending to care about Fry’s “mission” or whatever, but everyone knows it’s about catching those awkward glances through half-open doors. You know that guilty thrill when you’re watching something you shouldn’t but can’t stop anyway? That’s the whole mood. I spent too long peeking at Marge cleaning up with that slow, bored face, and boom - there’s a toy lying around that definitely isn’t for cleaning. Then Homer walks in and I swear he stares at it like it owes him money. Anyway. The humor is nasty in a way I didn’t expect: cheap but confident, like it *knows* you’re gonna laugh right before doing something pervy.

It tricks you with “rpg” talk but it’s less about grinding stats and more about grinding, well, you know. One second I’m fiddling with an inventory full of… creative gadgets, next I’m accidentally triggering a voyeur sequence with Shauna and it’s both funny and embarrassingly detailed. The sort of scene you’d alt-tab from if anyone walked by, but also the one you’d think about while pretending to scroll Instagram later. What gets me is how Fry reacts; he’s equal parts idiot and horny philosopher, muttering about destiny while fumbling with something that buzzes. It’s peak absurdity, but somehow it fits this crossover chaos between Futurama and Springfield.

I keep telling myself the “writing” is what I like - the dumb jokes about quantum teleportation and Meg Griffin’s cameo that somehow spirals into a weird morality lesson (don’t ask what kind) - but nah, I’m lying to myself. It’s messy, dumb, sometimes too self-aware, but I don’t stop playing. The sandbox setup means half the fun is doing things out of order just to watch characters react like they remember last night’s mistakes. Sometimes they even mention you. That’s the part that kinda freaked me out. Maybe that’s the point: voyeurism isn’t about watching - it’s about getting caught.

Alright so this My Hero Academia parody thing caught me completely off guard. Like, I went in expecting some basic fanservice nonsense but ended up spending way too much time figuring out how to properly "counsel" Rumi Usagiyama without her kicking my virtual teeth in. The rabbit hero's got this whole tsundere energy mixed with straight-up predator vibes that honestly makes zero sense but somehow works? One minute she's calling you a weakling, next she's grinding against your lap during what's supposed to be a professional therapy session. The AI-generated artwork looks decent enough for what it is, though Midnight's proportions are absolutely ridiculous even by anime standards.

What really gets me is how the dialogue system actually matters here. You can't just mash through conversations hoping for the lewdest option - these heroines will shut you down hard if you come on too strong too fast. Mirko especially seems programmed to test whether you're actually paying attention to her personality quirks or just trying to speedrun to the sex scenes. When I finally unlocked her bedroom scene after like an hour of carefully balanced flirting and psychological manipulation, the payoff felt genuinely earned instead of just handed to me. Though honestly the handjob animations could use some work, they loop weird.

The sandbox structure lets you bounce between different heroines whenever you want, which is perfect for when Midnight starts getting too clingy or Rumi's attitude becomes insufferable. Each girl has her own therapy schedule and mood system that you gotta track, plus there's this weird minigame where you massage their stress points that's way more involved than it needs to be. Sometimes the translation feels a bit off too - like when Mirko says something that's probably meant to be seductive but comes out sounding like a grocery list. Still hit different though, not gonna lie.