A proper hotel? No no, that's not what my father wanted. I'm re-reading his little notebook right now and the old pervert scribbled in the margins about "personal satisfaction audits" for new hires. I mean the game calls it a hotel but come on. We all know what's happening in room 4. It's a strip club with a lobby, basically, except you have to manage the plumbing budget for some reason.

My first hire was this blonde with eyes that follow you around the lobby. The real model thing threw me off at first, I was just clicking through her interview and then suddenly the striptease minigame starts. You don't just watch, you have to click along to the rhythm and if you mess up she gives you this look. This little disappointed pout. I didn't, I should say. It's not hard exactly, but who thought a brothel management sim needs a rhythm game.

The economic part is... it's there. You fiddle with room prices and buy better curtains. The girls generate money based on attributes and you're supposed to upgrade their skills. But honestly half the time I'm just sitting in the staff testing room, which is as creepy as it sounds. You personally verify each new employee. "Yeah this one's qualified. Definitely checking her resume." There's no way to automate it.

The humor lands sometimes. The translation's got that charming broken English thing going on, where menu items say things like "improve the pleasure generate" and I'm not sure if it's a typo or a philosophy. And my father's ghost or whatever keeps popping up with advice like he's a backseat driver on a road trip to Pound Town. Wish there was more variety in the strip routines. Same three songs, same animation pacing. After hiring six girls you've seen the trick. But I kept one called Candy on the roster way longer than her stats justified because she does this little shimmy thing during the performance review. Stupid.

I forgot to mention there's a whole upgrade tree for the "special services" floor. Don't ask me about the pricing strategy meta because I just put everything at mid-tier and called it a day. The client patience meter drains way too fast.