Vault 69 feels like somebody took a Fallout parody, spilled a full Pornhub search history on it, and then said “yeah ok, this is the plot now”. You play as the only useful dick in an underground vault that ran out of common sense and condoms at the same time. The Overseer basically pats you on the shoulder and says “go breed, champ”, while the whole place is full of desperate, half-broken, half-horny people that somehow still find time to argue about rations and power supply. It’s not subtle. It’s not trying to be smart. It just throws you into a post-apoc mess where your cock is both resource and weapon. You walk around the vault, talk to girls who are clearly one bad day from snapping, and every choice is like a weird mix of dating sim and HR management, if HR was about who gets to swallow and who only gets it up the ass.

What I liked is that the game doesn’t pretend sex is soft or romantic. It’s rough, dirty, and sometimes a little fucked up in the head. You’ve got big-titted slaves, “volunteers” that are clearly not okay, raiders topside who think “negotiation” means forcing the protagonist to prove his value by breaking in new captives. One scene had me trying a pickup line like “Let’s save humanity together” and the girl actually laughed at me before forcing me to go down on her as “practice” for future breeding candidates. Another time I tried a more aggressive line, something like “Bend over the desk, I’m tired of talking”, and she just locked the door and went full dom on me instead, using my face on the chair and calling it “evaluation”. The game loves flipping your expectations like that. Sometimes your cheesy line works and opens a new hardcore scene, sometimes it gets you punched, sometimes it triggers a weird management event about population stress where you’re suddenly filling forms after filling holes. And yeah, those stupid little stat prompts that pop up on screen, they feel like Excel sheet made horny. I hated it. I also kind of liked it. I don’t know.

Outside the vault it gets nastier and funnier at the same time. You meet wasteland chicks who are way more dangerous than the gun they’re holding, and somehow the dialogue still makes room for cringe pickup attempts. Had a moment where I tried to be smooth with a raider girl, something like “You look like trouble, I like trouble”, and she just put a boot on my chest and told me I’ll “earn the pussy” by bringing her slaves to trade. Next thing I know, I’m back in the vault doing this awkward loop of cold resource management and hot, brutal sex, trying to decide who gets treated like a person and who gets used like equipment. The violence can be a bit much sometimes, honestly, but the world is so broken it weirdly fits. I wish there were more soft scenes where characters just fuck for fun, not duty, but this setting is not really about cozy cuddling anyway. It’s about mouths full, asses sore, power plays everywhere, and you stuck in the middle pretending your shitty pickup lines are actually saving civilization. At least when I alt-tabbed to check Discord after a particularly harsh anal scene, my brain needed a second to remember that in real life, people don’t usually ask “What’s your breeding quota today?” so I guess the immersion works a little too well.

I didn’t expect the opening scene to slap that hard. You’re just standing there, half-broken hull around you, half-naked angel girl trying to look dignified while her collar blinks red every few seconds like some sick metronome. The captain walks in, voice like a bad radio signal, and you already know he’s going to be trouble. He touches her shoulder and - bam - your gut twists, not from shock, but from that weird cocktail of jealousy and arousal that this game keeps feeding you. It’s dirty, but not in the lazy way. The camera lingers too long, like it’s daring you to blink first. I didn’t. The whole thing plays out like someone’s fever dream of power and guilt and skin. Makes you feel complicit, which I kinda like. Some games treat voyeurism like a kink checkbox; this one makes it feel like a confession.

Then there’s that sequence in the maintenance bay - god, the lighting there. Blue flicker off the coolant pipes, the hum of half-dead machinery, and she’s there again, pretending not to notice you. The teasing is mean, but not cartoonishly so. She leans over, the slave tag glinting on her neck, and you can almost smell the metal. I won’t say the animation’s perfect - it isn’t - but it stumbles in a way that feels almost human. The moans don’t line up sometimes, and that somehow makes it better. You start thinking about the morality system that never really punishes you enough, about how the captain’s wives don’t even care you’re stealing glances, and then suddenly there’s a flashback about the fall of the Geniorcracy and I kind of stop caring about lore entirely. Maybe it matters, maybe not. What kept me there was that slow burn humiliation mixed with tenderness, like someone whispering “you’re disgusting” but softly.

Anyway, the soundtrack’s too clean, too polished - like it doesn’t belong in that filth. And I swear one of the sound cues is stolen from some old dating sim on Nutaku. Doesn’t matter. By the time the angel finally looks you in the eye, you’ve already forgotten what you were supposed to be doing.

It’s weird how this game keeps slipping between being horny and being kinda sad. Like one moment you’re scavenging a half-broken supermarket for canned beans, and the next you’re watching Tiffany bend over in that torn tank top, and you *know* the camera’s doing it on purpose. I thought it’d be just another zombie clicker thing, but then it starts poking at your nerves. You play as Mark, but you’re not really him, because half the time you’re watching what happens when he’s gone. It’s uncomfortable but also… hot? I don’t know. The animations are surprisingly smooth, not glossy, more like something someone obsessed over too long in a dark room. Her skin looks sticky in the flashlight. The moans sound too close, like she’s right next to your ear, whispering something you shouldn’t hear.

I wasn’t expecting the teasing parts to be so drawn out. There’s this bit where Alex “accidentally” touches her thigh, and you can tell she notices but pretends not to. Then later, the game just lets you wander around while that tension sits there, heavy. I thought I’d hate the sandbox thing, but it actually makes it worse - like you’re the one choosing to look away or not. The monsters outside barely matter after a while; they just groan in the background, a reminder that everything’s falling apart while something even messier happens inside. There’s a scene with oral that I didn’t think would hit me, but it’s messy and awkward and somehow more real than most. I wish the sound balance wasn’t so off though, the wet noises drown out the dialogue sometimes. Maybe that’s on purpose.

It’s not pretty, but that’s what makes it stick. The game doesn’t care if you feel guilty. It kind of wants you to. I kept thinking I’d stop after one more scene, but then I’d catch a glimpse of Tiffany walking past a broken window, the light hitting her skin just right, and I’d forget whatever I was supposed to be doing.

Civilization is basically a smoking crater, the streets are full of rotting corpses and hungry dead things, and somehow this game still manages to feel more about horny, stupid human choices than about the zombies themselves. You start in this ruined city where everyone keeps saying “freedom” like it’s a religion, and yeah, they absolutely use that word as an excuse to fuck anything that moves, drink anything that burns on the way down, and chase every dark kink they were too scared to Google when society still had laws. The vibe is half horror, half “what if Pornhub and a bad trip had a baby during Halloween cosplay night,” and honestly it kind of works. The writing swings from serious to trashy in like two clicks, one moment you’re checking a blood–smeared hallway and the next you’re balls-deep in some girl who thinks moaning louder keeps the undead away. Spoiler, it doesn’t.

What surprised me is how often the story gives you a choice that looks simple on screen but hits weird after. You’re not just picking “fuck / don’t fuck” every time, sometimes it’s “do you help this desperate guy who’s clearly high as hell” or “do you use this girl’s messed up daddy issues to get what you want.” It pushes that line where you catch yourself thinking, ok, I’m kind of an asshole here, but then you click anyway. There’s a scene early on where you’re holed up in a shitty apartment, sirens long dead, city quiet like a morgue, and your partner for the night wants to try something rough while there’s a zombie literally scratching the door. The game lets you decide if you stop and deal with the threat or keep going and turn it into fear-play. I picked the second option. Felt dirty, didn’t regret it, regretted it, still not sure. That’s the type of thing that sticks. The horror is not the dead; it’s you getting used to this new normal where necrotic moans outside are just background noise while you eat pussy on a broken kitchen counter. And yeah, the game knows exactly what it’s doing when it leans into drugs, shady trades for sex, and people using the apocalypse as an excuse to finally turn their porn tags into real life. Sometimes it’s hot, sometimes it’s gross, and sometimes those two are the same thing and the game just shrugs and lets you click “continue.”