Dickboy's got problems, and honestly, so does this game. The whole premise revolves around this wannabe hero stumbling through Gotham trying to collect random shit in the right order - sounds simple enough until you realize the game's logic makes about as much sense as Batman's tax returns. You'll spend half your time clicking everything like a maniac because the sequence requirements are more cryptic than Riddler's worst puzzles.

But here's where it gets interesting - the character encounters are surprisingly well done for something this janky. Poison Ivy shows up looking absolutely fuckable with her green skin glistening, and when Catwoman slinks onto screen... damn. The art style reminded me of those old Newgrounds animations, except with way more explicit content and less coherent storytelling. Robin makes an appearance too, though I'm not sure why anyone thought that was necessary. The sex scenes themselves are pretty raw - no fancy animations here, just straight-up hardcore action that doesn't pretend to be anything more sophisticated than it is.

What really caught me off guard was how much I ended up enjoying the puzzle aspect, even though I just complained about it. Yeah, the item collection is frustrating as hell, but there's something satisfying about finally cracking the code and watching Dickboy get his reward. The dialogue is cheesy enough to be entertaining without being completely cringe, and Harley Quinn's scenes are particularly wild - she brings that chaotic energy you'd expect. The whole thing feels like someone's fever dream interpretation of DC characters, which honestly works better than it should. Just don't expect any deep gameplay mechanics or stunning production values. Sometimes you want a quick, dirty parody that doesn't take itself seriously, and this delivers exactly that experience.

Tifa in Milk Plant 9 feels like someone took all the “what if we just ruin this girl completely” comments from old hentai boards and turned it into a single focused torture room. No plot setup, no warm up, you’re just thrown into this lab vibe where Tifa is already strapped, naked, and everything is built around her boobs and her bladder. The game is honest about what it is. It’s not romance, not corruption, not “slow build.” It’s humiliation porn pointed directly at her chest and pussy. You’ve got this big-breasted Tifa, FF7 style with that familiar look, but here she’s just meat for the machine, a brunette doll whose whole worth is: how much milk can you squeeze out, how hard can you make her pee, how long can you keep her in that sweet spot between begging and breaking. The controls are simple enough that after one minute you’re already doing nasty combos, switching between pressing those swollen tits and teasing her shaved slit until her body just gives up control. There’s something really dirty about the way the milk doesn’t come out pretty. It spatters, it drips, it floods. Same with the piss. When you line it right, it’s like you trigger this double fountain moment, milk spraying from her nipples while she loses it down below. The game actually rewards you for pushing her that far, like “yes, this is what we want, keep going.” It is cruel, but in a way that feels very on brand for old-school hentai flash torture stuff, just dressed up a bit more focused on fetish instead of story.

What surprised me is how much the game leans into the “laboratory” style milking. Tifa is more cow than fighter here, and the tools you get show that. You’re not just flicking on a single pump and waiting. You are adjusting pressure, rhythm, where exactly to press, how long to keep it there before she starts leaking. If you’re into breast expansion, there are moments where her boobs look so overfilled it’s actually a little uncomfortable to watch, and that is exactly the point. The way the devs linked arousal with humiliation is nasty in a good way. You play with her nipples too much, she starts leaking faster, then you push the torture tools again and she’s basically forced to cum while covered in her own milk and piss. There is a tiny issue that annoyed me: the pee sound looping slightly late compared to the animation. It is small, but once you hear it off-sync, you keep waiting for it to click right, and it never really does. Some reactions also repeat a bit too fast, like her face cycling through the same pain expression when you hold pressure for long. Still, when you time everything and manage that “explosion” they clearly want you to hit, it’s stupidly satisfying in a very degenerate way. It feels more like being a mad pervert scientist poking at a Final Fantasy trophy girl, trying to see how far her body can go before it just turns into a leaking fountain of milk and pee, and honestly, that is exactly what this thing is built for.

Ciri walking into your filthy half broken fortress, already annoyed and already hotter than your browser history, is honestly the perfect mood for this thing. You are not some noble mentor here, more like the horny landlord of Kaer Morhen trying to decide if you want a legendary monster hunter or a legendary cum dumpster, and the game just looks you in the eye and says: “make up your damn mind.” From the first training session it hits that weird mix of parody and actual Witcher nostalgia. One second you are telling her to focus on her stance and sword grip, next second you are noticing they put a lot of effort into her tits bouncing when she screws up the dodge. It’s that kind of energy. You click through what looks like a normal drill, she misses a move, you “punish” her, and the punishment is suddenly way less PG than you expected. In a good way. Or terrible way, depending how pure you lied to yourself you are.

What I liked is that it pretends to be about discipline and routine at the start. Basic fights, alchemy lessons, some spells. Ciri asking legit questions about potions and signs, trying to be serious, you answering like a half competent teacher who is also staring at her ass. Then the options creep in. Say the wrong “encouraging” line? Boom, now she thinks moaning gets her a reward. Make her drink a slightly “experimental” potion? There goes her self control, and suddenly practice swings become grinding on your leg while she tries to explain it is just to “feel the balance of the blade.” The game keeps tossing you choices that feel harmless at first and then five scenes later you realize you built a complete slut and it was absolutely your fault. Or you tried to be nice and strict and it still turned horny, because it is that kind of parody where the universe itself is perverted. Also, the little details are messed up in a fun way. The crack in the wall of her room that you barely notice then ends up in a scene. The empty training yard that somehow turns into the stage for a public “motivation” lesson. Even the money grind to fix bits of the fortress turns out to just unlock new ways to humiliate or empower her, depending which flavor of degenerate you picked that day. It really feels like a long, cursed Tinder date with destiny itself, where every “sure, why not” option bang you in the face three scenes later, and Ciri either stands on the ruins as a badass witcher or kneels in them with her mouth open, because of every tiny horny decision you pretended was “just to see what happens.”

Become Alpha is a porn game with tons of memes, kickass branching storyline, quests, RPG-like experience system, and a possibility to have sex with many partners. It's also pretty damn funny. The story is about Harry Panuchkin who's a nerd and a wannabe gangster. He has a big dick, but never actually used it. It's your job to help him get the pussy and make him a proper alpha male, that he always wanted to be.