Three words first: horny, awkward, fun.

The game feels like someone mashed together a dating sim, a quarantine sharehouse and those trashy hentai manhwas you read on the toilet, then said “ok, now make it about pickup lines and see how long the guy can pretend he’s faithful.” You play this dude stuck with a bunch of hot girls who all know exactly what they’re doing with their bodies, while he’s trying so hard to act like some “good boyfriend” scientist, like he’s doing research on female pleasure instead of just staring at their tits. The whole thing is basically one long speed-dating session where you never leave the table, except the table has a big ass milf leaning over it and a bratty school girl pressing her thigh against your leg while she laughs at your shitty flirty lines. The pickup system is where it’s funniest and most frustrating. Sometimes one dumb line like “your laugh is cute” suddenly turns into her grabbing your wrist, placing your hand on her thigh and whispering in your ear while you’re hard and sweating. Other times you try to be smooth, stack teasing options, and she just looks at you like you’re a pervert who can’t even spell “consent”, then still ends up jerking you off five clicks later after some fake moral struggle. It reminds me of using Tinder then accidentally opening Hinge on horny mode.

There’s a lot of sandbox wandering where you’re just checking rooms, poking your nose where it doesn’t belong, “observing” them like some half-assed psychologist. You talk about relationships, then suddenly her cleavage is right in your face, animated and jiggly, and the voice acting goes from casual to this breathy “do you like that?” that sounds way too real for a mobile game. One moment you’re in a school-ish setting, pretending to learn how to “communicate better with women”, next moment she’s on her knees, drool on your shaft, giving this sloppy oral that makes you forget which dialogue choice even got you here. There’s titfucks that feel like a reward for picking the more playful options, and if you push a bit further and pick the more dominant answers, some scenes flip on you and the girl starts controlling everything, pinning you down, hand around your dick, strokes just slow enough to drive you insane while she talks about her boyfriend like you’re just a practice toy. The anal and more rough stuff doesn’t explode in your face right away, it creeps in through dirty jokes and “accidental” touches, and when it finally happens the game kind of shrugs like “yeah, you knew this was coming.” Speaking of coming, masturbation scenes feel personal, like when you fail a pickup line and the MC ends alone, jerking off on his phone while remembering how her ass looked pressed against his crotch earlier, with her voice echoing in his head. That part hit a bit too close to my Pornhub history, not gonna lie. There are a few moments where the pacing dies, you’re stuck clicking through teasing without payoff, like you’re in an endless edging loop designed by a sadist, and there’s one notification sound that kept popping up on my phone and I hated it, never turned it off, no idea why. Still, when a milf with big tits, soft voice and that smug “I know you’re hard” grin orders you to sit, unzip and let her “teach” you how to please a woman with your hands while she rides your fingers and strokes you at the same time, all that slow grind suddenly makes sense, then stops making sense again right after you cum and start overthinking your next line.

Sophia Parker looks like the kind of woman who should be drinking wine in the kitchen and talking about PTA meetings, but the game is basically about how fast that image breaks once she hits San Alejo. You start as this middle-aged wife and mom who keeps telling herself she’s “happily married”, while the city around her is hot, sticky, and full of people who stare at her tits like they’re a public monument. Her new life feels way too big for her, big house, big backyard, big everything, and the story kind of pokes her from all sides until she stops pretending she doesn’t like being watched. What sells it is that you don’t just click through scenes, you pick how she reacts when someone’s eyes linger too long on her ass, or when the neighbor just “accidentally” sees her sunbathing. One moment she’s scolding someone for looking, next moment you’re choosing whether she keeps her bikini top on while she leans forward a little too much. It’s less about stats, more about how far you’re willing to push her, and how much she lies to herself while doing it.

The game gets really spicy around Ellie and Logan though. There’s this branch where Ellie forgives Logan, but only if you’ve basically turned Sophia into her secret lesbian safety net first. Those earlier scenes with Sophia and Ellie matter a lot more than they look at first. You’re not just clicking “kiss” or “no,” you’re building this slow burn where Sophia goes from awkward “I’m your mom’s friend” hugs to sitting too close, to that first time she lets Ellie’s hand stay on her thigh a few seconds too long. When you finally hit the event where Ellie has taken Logan back, the tension is brutal in a good way. She’s technically “his girl” again, but she’s still sneaking these hungry, guilty looks at Sophia when they’re alone, and you feel it. There’s this one scene where they’re in the backyard at night, the house lights on behind them, and you can choose whether Sophia pretends not to notice Ellie’s nipples poking through her top, or just stares and lets it happen. I picked the second one, obviously, and it turns into this messy, wet makeout with Ellie grinding on Sophia’s leg like she hasn’t touched herself in weeks, while the game keeps reminding you Logan is literally inside the house. That mix of cheating, voyeur vibe, and “I shouldn’t be doing this but I really want to taste her again” is pretty much the core of the whole thing. It likes to put Sophia in spots where someone could walk in at any moment, or where a window is just a little too open, and then let you decide if she plays it safe or spreads her legs a bit wider and hopes no one is looking. She’s got big tits, a thick ass, and the camera knows it, especially when she’s on her knees, mouth shiny, pretending she’s still the good wife while her tongue is all over another girl. You can call it romance, sure, except every time you try to convince yourself it’s “about feelings,” the game drops another scene of Sophia masturbating alone after, fingering herself hard because the memory of Ellie’s tongue or some forbidden glance has her soaked, and she can’t blame the city for that.

You start as this shy-looking, kinda nerdy occult freak in a school that feels way too normal for the shit that starts happening. First scene already hits like a truck: steamy shower, another girl walks in, cute face, soft voice, then you look down and she is packing. No slow build up, just straight “oh fuck, I’m on my knees now, guess I’m into this.” The game really leans into that “I lost control and liked it way too much” vibe. The ahegao faces your MC makes when she gets throat fucked or filled are way over the top, but in a fun way. It is not subtle at all, she looks like her soul left her body every time someone cums in her. Felt kinda cursed to be clicking through dialogue about angels and demon lore while my protagonist is getting creampied in the school bathroom and moaning like she’s in a porn compilation, but somehow it works.

Then that dusty bookstore thing happens and you get the Crowley family drama, hell politics, Lilith doing petty ex energy, all that religious corruption fantasy. I liked that they don’t pretend your girl is “pure.” From the beginning she is horny, curious, and already into weird shit. The corruption is more about power and mindset than “good girl turns bad.” One moment you are just a confused futa/trans occult student who masturbates in her room to creepy demon symbols, next moment you are juggling a growing group of girls, MILFs, monster chicks and actual demons who all want to either worship you, ride you, or ruin you. There is a nun with religious guilt issues who talks about sin while she is literally sitting on your face, and I laughed and also got hard. That balance of “this is kinda silly” and “this blowjob scene is actually hot” is one of the best things, even when the writing goes a bit too edgy.

Sandbox part is messy in that janky porn game way. You wander around, trigger events, sometimes you get a handjob, sometimes you get nothing and just read some extra occult text you forgot instantly. I kinda loved being lost though. It felt like scrolling horny Twitter with ten tabs open: you go to check on one girl, end up in the library with a demon milf explaining how to open a dimensional gate using your pussy as a ritual focus. There is an early event where a monster girl pins you to the bed, fucks your ass slow while whispering promises of power, then suddenly switches and uses you like a cum dump, filling every hole and leaving you drooling and glassy-eyed. I was like “ok this is too much” while clicking next as fast as possible. My only stupid complaint is that some minor scenes repeat with almost the same dirty talk and it annoyed me for no real reason. But then I unlocked this bukkake ritual where half your harem coats your face as an offering to a demon queen and I forgot I was mad. It is messy, blasphemous, full of incest hints, possessive lesbians, anal curses, weird rituals and way too many fluids. Honestly feels like browsing a horny occult subreddit at three different levels of degeneracy at once, and I mean that in the nicest, filthiest way.

Tali is absolutely not the shy little quarian tech nerd people remember from the original games. Here she’s more like the center of a very rude quiz show where every question is “How far are you willing to go this time?” and the answer keeps getting filthier. The story picks up after she escapes this messed up ghost ship, and instead of going back to anything safe, she ends up bouncing around space with a bunch of “friends” who have very specific ideas about what to do with her suit, her body, and her obedience. One moment you’re in a legit combat scene, trying to manage shields and positioning, and the next moment losing a fight means Tali is on her knees, visor fogged, being used like a trophy by whatever monster just wrecked you. And yeah, the camera really loves her ass. Whoever built those shots deserves an award. Maybe “Excessive Focus On Tali’s Butt” gold medal.

The game kind of feels like a horny Mass Effect quiz where every choice is secretly: a) blowjob, b) anal, c) corruption, d) all of the above. You run around in this sandbox structure, poke different parts of the ship or station, and suddenly you’re in some awkward scene with Liara teasing her while EDI throws dry comments in the background like she’s hosting a porn podcast. One of my favorite dumb moments: I was half-tabbing out to check Discord, left a teasing scene running with Tali “practicing” oral on some alien cock, came back and she had switched positions and was riding instead because I let the idle animation chain continue. No tooltip, no pop up, just “you ignored the scene, now she’s even more corrupted, congrats.” It’s janky in spots, the animations sometimes loop too obviously, and Kasumi just kind of appears, steals the spotlight with a handjob scene, then vanishes again like a horny ninja. Never explained properly, and the game just shrugs and moves on.

What’s nice is how it leans fully into parody without being shy about anything. Miranda’s big tits are used exactly how you think, Ashley is still an uptight soldier but now her idea of discipline is getting Tali to “follow orders” with vaginal and anal rewards, and somewhere in the middle Shepard is there, but half of the time feels like a side character in his own porn. The corruption aspect creeps up on you in a stupidly fun way: early Tali is awkward, blushing, touching herself alone in a quiet room, just masturbation and a bit of teasing. A few bad fights lost, some “training” with Shiala and Samara, one very wrong encounter with a slime-like monster, and suddenly she’s the one grabbing cocks first, begging for more, suit open in places you’re pretty sure are not Alliance regulation. It’s dirty, it’s uneven, it repeats a couple of angles too much, and the UI sometimes hides a choice you swear should be there. But when she bends over in zero-g and the whole scene turns into this slow, weightless anal fuck with her gasping inside the helmet, you kind of forget what you were annoyed about. Or what you were doing before the scene started. Or why Jira is still open in another tab.