Man, this MHA dating sim is like finding a twenty dollar bill in your old jeans pocket - unexpectedly good but kinda wrinkled around the edges. The Koikatsu engine does most of the heavy lifting here, and honestly? It works better than it has any right to. You're basically living out every weeb's fantasy of hooking up with the Class 1-A girls, plus some pro heroes who definitely shouldn't be giving you the time of day but here we are.

The character roster is honestly impressive - we got Ochako being all cute and bubbly, Momo with that rich girl energy that somehow makes the paizuri scenes hit different, and don't even get me started on Mirko because that rabbit hero will absolutely wreck you in the best possible way. Mt Lady's scenes are chef's kiss, especially when she's in that cheerleader outfit that makes zero sense contextually but who cares. The dialogue tries to stay true to the characters which is... ambitious, I'll give them that. Sometimes Tsuyu sounds exactly like herself, other times she's spouting lines that would make Mineta blush. It's inconsistent but when it works, it really works.

Look, the gameplay loop is pretty standard dating sim stuff - talk to girls, pick dialogue options, unlock increasingly spicy scenes. Nothing groundbreaking there. But the variety of positions and scenarios keeps things interesting. The footjob scene with Jiro had me questioning my life choices in the best way, and the lesbian content with Toga and Uraraka is surprisingly well animated. Sure, some of the English translation reads like it went through Google Translate twice, and occasionally the girls' personalities do complete 180s between scenes, but when you're balls deep in a threesome with Mina and Hagakure (invisible girl jokes write themselves), you're not exactly critiquing the narrative consistency. The visual novel elements feel tacked on but whatever, we're not here for Shakespeare.

I didn’t expect to laugh this much while, you know, also being wildly turned on. *Furry Bang Town* sounds like some cheap meme bait, but halfway through the first date scene with that smug wolf barista (he keeps pretending he’s bored while his tail literally wags), I realized this game knows exactly what it’s doing. There’s this weird mix of parody and genuine horniness - it flirts with irony but still goes all in when things get wet. The humor hits that awkward space where you don’t know if you’re supposed to cringe or moan. And the writing? Kind of broken in places, but in a way that feels like someone poured their kinks into Google Translate and said, “good enough.” It works. Too well maybe.

I keep thinking about Judy - not the movie one, but the version here who’s somehow both a cop and a futa stripper on weekends. Her route wrecked me; she teases like she’s reading your mind, then there’s this beach scene where she just drops the uniform and starts talking about “justice” while grinding against your thigh. It’s ridiculous. I almost closed the tab, but the sound design pulled me back - heavy breathing layered with seagulls and waves, absurdly effective. Then suddenly, boom, Pokémon crossover out of nowhere. A Lucario bartender offering “protein shots.” I wanted to roll my eyes, but I was already clicking through dialogue faster than I’d like to admit.

The public use scenes are messy in every sense - crowded cafe bathrooms, fur everywhere, people pretending not to watch. It’s filthy, kind of funny, and weirdly intimate. I hated that it made me feel something beyond just arousal. Also, the ending just stops mid-sentence, like the dev gave up or came too early. Still, I can’t stop thinking about that line where the pony character whispers, “You smell like story.” What does that even mean? Maybe nothing. Maybe everything. I’m probably overthinking it, but whatever - this game got under my skin in ways it really shouldn’t have.

It’s a weird kind of wrong that feels almost too confident about itself. The game just throws you right into this hotel-room-styled tension between Ben and Gwen, like there’s no excuse, no build-up, just quiet breathing and the kind of slow curiosity that only gets worse the more you watch. The control scheme is barely there - you think you’re just clicking around to peek, but then you’re moving hands and lips like you’re trying to pass off an accident as an experiment. The pacing makes it feel like time stretches sideways. There’s that one moment where Gwen turns, half-asleep, and it’s not clear if she knows what’s happening, and you catch yourself leaning closer like a total creep. God help me, I think that’s intentional.

Half the time the audio feels too loud, but maybe that’s the point - it’s not polished, like it’s meant to break the “cartoon world” with uncomfortable realism. The blowjob scene looks like it was stitched together by someone who didn’t care about pretty, just raw motion, the way her throat tightens around him while he mutters things that sound more like apologies than dirty talk. And then when you switch to doggystyle, yeah it’s cliché, but the way the lighting flickers - it’s distracting as hell and, weirdly, kind of hypnotic. The game’s rhythm keeps screwing with you: it slows down on the heavy stuff like missionary creampie and then speeds up when you least expect, like the code itself is embarrassed about what it’s showing. I got annoyed at that. Then again, maybe that’s why I didn’t stop.

You can tell whoever made this knew exactly what nostalgia they were playing with, too. There’s this sick mix of childhood memory and adult hunger that no one wants to admit enjoying. Kind of like watching something too close to a secret. The handjob bit feels almost shy, then the facial lands out of nowhere, breaking the build-up in the most abrupt, stupidly real way. I hate that it worked. I hate that my mouse hand twitched even after the final loop restarted. If that’s not the most human reaction, I don’t know what is.

Kasumi Rebirth feels like catching someone’s private mod folder that accidentally got pushed live and nobody had the heart to stop it. It’s just Kasumi, chained up, not doing the “cool ninja” thing at all, and the whole game is basically you seeing how far you can push her body before you get bored or feel weird about yourself. She hangs there in those metal restraints, soft skin, big tits squeezed by the outfit that you immediately start ripping off, because of course you do. There is no fake romance, no “story” pretending this isn’t what it is. You poke her, grab her, slide hands over her tits, pinch her nipples a bit too hard, then harder, just to see if the reaction changes. It turns into this quiet little lab experiment: what if I put fingers in her pussy first, then in her ass, then both, then ignore both and just use her tits like they are toys made of warm jelly. The game doesn’t judge. It just lets you be a freak in peace.

The main loop of Kasumi Rebirth is strangely hypnotic: click, drag, spread her legs, tilt her hips, line her up for doggystyle, then get distracted and go back to playing with her mouth. You pull her head back, slide a dildo between her lips, watch those eyes say everything without a single line of dialog. Deepthroat her with plastic, then switch holes like a bored god with too much free time. Pussy, ass, mouth, back to pussy, then push it in her asshole again just because you like the way she tightens around it. You can masturbate her slowly, tease her clit until she twitches, then ram something inside and go straight for a rough creampie like the concept of foreplay never existed. Cumshots on her face, on her breasts, slipping down her body, and at some point I tried to see if I could cover both tits perfectly and got annoyed because one drop kept sliding off the side in a stupid way that distracted me more than it should. There is also this breast expansion thing going on that feels like someone’s late-night fever dream: you start tweaking and pumping and suddenly her big tits are not just big, they are ridiculous, heavy, almost comical, but somehow it works because this game stopped pretending to be “normal” a long time ago. It is rough, it is ***-y, it is torture dressed up as “gentle play”, and yet the whole thing has this old-school Internet porn game energy that makes you keep testing one more position, one more angle, one more messy facial, just to see how far Kasumi’s body can be turned into a toy before you finally close the tab and swear you’re done with Dead or Alive girls forever.