This thing feels like someone took a bootleg monster anime, got drunk, spilled it on a beach collection from Fashion Nova, and then let tentacles do the stitching. I mean that in a half-compliment, half “what the hell” way. You start on this weird bright island that looks kinda cute at first, like a postcard from a cheap resort. Then you click a couple times and suddenly the “enemies” are less about fighting and more about who gets to grab whose thighs. As a lingerie designer, my brain is screaming and clapping at the same time. The girls are running around in outfits that are basically one wardrobe malfunction away from disappearing, like bikini tops that look like they were tied by someone who failed home ec, with strings just begging to be yanked by some horny forest creature. I kept pausing the game and thinking, ok, if I sell a bra this tiny on Instagram, Stripe will definitely block my account. The little arrow in the bottom right, honestly, became my pervert sewing machine. Click. New scene. Click. Less clothing. Click. Oh, now we’re doing full-on creampie with glowing monster-spooge like it’s some sort of magical body highlighter. Pure chaos, but my kind of chaos.

There is this one scene in the forest where a girl is cornered by what looks like a “totally-not-that-famous-monster” with too many arms. The way those tentacles curl around her hips, sliding under the tiny strips of fabric, feels like a designer’s worst nightmare and wet dream at same time. I was low-key judging the cut of her panties while also watching them get pushed aside and filled from every angle, and I’m sitting here like, ok, they clearly never tested these in motion. Zero support, 10/10 access. That monster basically rips the idea of underwear apart and I respect that. The game does this all the time: starts with something kinda innocent, like a teasing pose, then in three clicks she’s dripping, pinned against some weird tree, getting pumped full until there’s cum leaking out like glossy milk over lace. Completely unrealistic, obviously, but tell that to half the DMs I get on Twitter from dudes asking for “tentacle bra harness” customs. By the way, the color choices in the scenes are wild; the slime and cum swirling over their bodies actually made me think, hm, pearlescent elastic straps could look hot on real skin. I hate how inspiring it is. I also hate that you can use cheats and just blast through to the dirtier parts, because I tell myself I care about story, then instantly skip it the second someone mentions a hidden route. One second you’re reading, the next you’re watching a monster empty itself inside her like it owns a timeshare in her womb. And I’m just here tweaking a lace bodysuit design on my iPad, thinking: yeah, that cut would survive maybe two seconds with these “enemies” before turning into nothing but a fancy collar around her neck.

Con-Quest feels like someone smashed together a horny anime convention, a cheap RPG Maker fever dream, and that one time you got lost inside an actual con and just followed the most ridiculous cosplay you could find. It is messy as hell in places, but that kind of messy that feels like a real project, not some factory porn thing. You walk around a con full of geek girls in cosplay, fight them, strip them, collect them as summons, then use those same girls to beat up even hotter boss girls. It sounds dumb written like that, and it kind of is, but it also leans so hard into the dumb that it becomes its own thing. The tone swings between goofy and horny all the time. One second you are chasing magic sex pills for some stupid sidequest, next second a tentacle slime girl is choking your HP bar while your brain is busy staring at her tits. The game keeps that vibe where everyone is just one bad decision away from flashing you, which, honestly, is the whole point.

What I like a lot is how the lewd stuff is glued into the quests instead of just being a reward gallery on the side. You are not just clicking on pictures. You have these small adventures like Felicia’s candy-gram errand that sounds harmless and suddenly you are doing a weird scavenger hunt across the con just because the payoff is more CG of her acting all cute and slutty. Joyce turning into a summon feels like crossing a line you probably should not cross with con staff, yet the game is like, “yeah, now you can call her in battle to smack other girls around while half naked.” The summons in general are a bit broken and I love that. Calling Michelle after her crab quest and watching her wreck another cosplay girl while the text still tries to sound like a normal RPG? It is such a stupid power trip. You feel like a horny Pokémon trainer who only catches girls that are ready to jump your bones. Then the game pokes fun at itself, like those hints in the CG viewer, as if it knows you are clicking every corner just to unlock one more shot of a girl with cum on her face and a ruined cosplay. Sometimes the pacing sucks, sometimes the jokes miss, sometimes the comedy undercuts the erotic mood right when you are actually turned on. It should annoy me more than it does, but the whole horny-con RPG idea is so specific and so unapologetic that I keep walking around the halls, starting another questline, hoping the next summoned geek girl is even more fucked up than the last one.

Con-Quest is like getting lost in the horniest anime convention on earth, then realizing the dungeon is actually the dealer hall and every random encounter is a girl in a too-tight costume who wants to either fight you, fuck you, or both in the same five minutes. It pretends to be this goofy little RPG, with silly jokes and parody monsters, but after a while your brain just goes “ok whatever” and your hand is already on auto-pilot any time you see a new cosplay girl appear. The whole thing feels like someone mashed together a con schedule, a hentai folder, and an old-school RPG Maker project, then kept adding new lewd scenes every time fans yelled at them on Newgrounds and Patreon. It shouldn’t work as well as it does, but here we are.

The best part for me is how it doesn’t take itself seriously at all. You walk around this convention where everyone is half-naked and half-cursed, and suddenly you’re in a “battle” against some magical girl knockoff whose outfit looks like it lost a fight with gravity. You’re throwing items, doing simple attacks, trying to “capture” girls for your collection, and the game rewards you with these stupidly hot scenes where their outfits tear, or their spells misfire, or they end up tied up in some very not-PG pose. It’s like the game is constantly saying “yeah yeah, plot, whatever, here’s another horny cosplay disaster.” One second it’s joking about well-known anime titles, next second it’s just straight-up hentai with cum everywhere and you forgot there even was a quest log. Some of the humor lands hard, like when the boss thinks she’s this epic dark sorceress, but her attack animation looks like a cheap kids show and then her clothes pop off in a way that would absolutely get that show banned. Other jokes are just dumb and fall flat, but honestly by then you’re not reading, you’re staring at thighs.

I really like that it’s not polished in that AAA way. The sprites and CGs have this messy, horny energy, like the artist was giggling half the time drawing tits bigger than the character’s head, and the animations sometimes loop a bit weird, but it actually makes the whole thing feel more personal, more “made for us” instead of for some imaginary horny focus group. You wander around, bump into some girl dressed as a wizard, lose the fight on purpose just to see what the “punishment” scene is, then reload and win so you can see the other version too. There are these little moments, like when you’re in a random hallway with nothing happening, and suddenly you trigger a silly side event with a cosplayer whose costume is falling apart piece by piece while she tries to cast spells and keep her tits inside the fabric at the same time, and you just think “yes, this is the real endgame.” There are small things that annoy me, like how sometimes you want to replay a scene and the game makes you slog through a bit of clicking again and again, and you never quite know if you missed a secret lewd event or if it just isn’t there yet. But that kind of chaos is also what keeps me checking back for new episodes, seeing which character got turned into magical fodder next. If you want to squeeze everything out of it, my only real advice is: click on stupid stuff, lose on purpose sometimes, and never trust a girl in a cute outfit holding a magic staff. She’s either going to blast you or blow you, and honestly, both routes are worth seeing.

Pussymon feels like somebody took a monster catching RPG, left it alone with a horny DeviantArt account and a folder of bad dragon porn, and just let nature happen. You start as this kinda broke adventurer drifting through a fantasy world that looks normal at first, then you realize every “monster” you catch is basically a walking fetish with ears, tails, claws, and a pussy that gets more screen time than their face. The game doesn’t even pretend to be shy about it. You go out, explore some half-busted maps, pick fights with weirdly cute dragon girls, win, and your reward is a sex scene that looks like something a really dedicated hentai fan drew after a long week. They’re not just “girl with horns” either. Some of the dragon Pussymon feel like mix of pet, girlfriend, sex toy and weapon, which is deeply fucked up in all the right ways for adult content. You level them by feeding candy, then suddenly they evolve into something bigger with sharper teeth and bigger tits, and the game just shrugs like “yeah, that’s normal”.

What I like most is how dirty the whole thing feels in a good way. The quests are basic, but they always end in some weird porn logic. “Go fetch dragon girl A” turns into “oh, by the way, here is a full-on hentai card of her riding you raw as a reward”. It’s the kind of game you play with one hand on the mouse and the other already thinking about Pornhub backup plans if you finish too fast. I had it running in one tab, Telegram pinging me, Spotify looping the same track, and still I kept clicking for “just one more” encounter because I wanted to see the next sexcard. And yeah, the parody vibe is strong. You can tell it’s poking at Pokémon and that kind of stuff, but instead of gym badges you end up collecting which monster girl has already drained you dry. Some animations feel a bit cheap, some dialogue looks like it was written too late at night on Discord, and the battle system kind of stumbles between “oh cool idea” and “why the hell did she one-shot me after letting me cum on her face in the last scene”. Honestly though, that messy energy fits. It’s like fanfic that ignores canon power levels just to get two characters naked faster. One moment you’re thinking about strategy, the next you’re staring at a dragon furry riding you hard and moaning, and all your big thoughts about balance and design just vanish into “ok, yeah, fuck me up like that again”.