Crossunder Academy looks at you and goes, “yeah, you’re the new kid, you don’t know shit, but here, have power anyway.” You roll in thinking it’s just another school VN with some tits glued on, and then they throw you into the Student Council and suddenly you’re the class president, fake tie, fake responsibilities, and very real chances to fuck half the campus if you don’t screw it up. It starts tame, like a dating sim pretending to be serious: club budgets, school events, that kind of filler. Then you figure out every boring “proposal” conversation is basically foreplay. The shy club rep who wants more money for “equipment” leans over your desk a bit too far, blouse a little too tight, and you’ve got the classic choice pop-up: act professional, tease her, or slide right into horny territory and test how far she’s willing to go to get that funding. You know which one you click. Don’t lie.

The fun part is how it mixes the puzzle feeling with porn without turning into some clicker trash. You’re not matching gems or anything stupid like that, you’re juggling scenes. Say the wrong thing to one girl and she gets jealous when you’re alone with her teacher later, and suddenly that nice slow blowjob under the desk becomes “sorry, I can’t, people will talk.” Say the right thing and the same teacher is on her knees, glasses fogged up, working your cock like she’s grading on a curve. Some routes feel like you’re solving a horny jigsaw puzzle with horny pieces. You’re planning event schedules while secretly thinking, “ok, if Hermione-clone student nerd and that thick aunt-looking lunch lady are both there, can I push them into some exhibitionist shit?” and sometimes the game actually lets you pull it off. There are moments where the camera settles into POV and it’s just you, her big tits pressed right into the frame, your cock between them for a messy titfuck, and the sound design goes from cartoony to “oh, someone actually cared here.” Then next scene a different girl is doing this ahegao face like she’s auditioning for a meme compilation and it almost kills the mood, but you keep clicking because, well, creampie counter is not going to fill itself.

It leans hard into the fantasy faculty and campus girls archetypes. You’ve got the prim bookworm who clearly wants to be ruined in the library after hours, the fake innocent student council girl who’s absolutely into groping behind closed doors, the curvy “tradwife” type who talks about cooking and chores while riding you raw, and that one busty older woman that might as well have “MILF” written on her forehead. Half the time you’re trying to act like a respectable president in meetings, half the time you’re lining up which corridor to “inspect” so you can corner someone and see how far she’ll go if the hallway cameras are “mysteriously” off. There’s teasing everywhere, a little too much sometimes: she’s in your lap, skirt hiked up, grinding on you, moaning in your ear about how wrong it is in a school setting, and the scene still stalls until you pick the right dialog line before it lets you finally push inside. When it does click though, the game doesn’t flinch: deep throat, sloppy oral, thick ass bouncing in your lap, cum inside, cum outside, cum on her face while she’s making that stupid cross-eyed expression. It’s messy, a bit goofy, sometimes hot as hell, sometimes clunky as fuck, but it feels like an actual degenerate school fantasy where your choices matter just enough to make you paranoid you missed one more filthy route.

It’s weird how this game feels like two different fever dreams stitched together with duct tape and a dirty laugh track. One minute you’re dealing with a spoiled princess who thinks she’s too good for your commands, next you’re in a dusty classroom trying to make a witch blush while pretending you’re not the worst kind of pervert. The whole thing runs like someone dumped Aladdin and Harry Potter fanfics into a blender, hit “liquify,” then forgot to clean the blades. I mean that as a compliment. Mostly. There’s something strangely addictive about watching these characters slide from pride to obedience, like watching a tower of cards collapse in slow motion while you whisper filth into the wind.

And yeah, the art - old-school 2D, a bit grainy at the edges - somehow makes it hotter. You notice every smirk, every drop of sweat, every time the princess rolls her eyes before giving in. The witch, though… she’s the real trip. The game makes her crack little by little, until she’s doing things she’d hex you for even thinking about. There’s this one scene with a mirror spell - don’t even ask, it’s messy, beautiful, wrong, and perfect all at once. I wish the sound effects weren’t so cheap, though. Like, if I wanted to hear the same “slap” noise on loop, I’d just open TikTok. But then again, maybe that janky sound is part of the charm. Makes it feel dirtier, less polished, more like something you shouldn’t be caught playing but can’t stop anyway.

Also, whoever added the management bits deserves both a medal and a slap. You’re juggling gold, obedience, lust - whatever - and it feels like running a brothel disguised as a school. Which… is exactly what it is, I guess? The tentacle stuff sneaks up on you too, not even kidding. One second you’re giving a lecture, next thing you know, it’s hentai biology class. Half the time I’m disgusted, half the time I’m grinning like an idiot. That’s the magic here: it’s trashy, shameless, and somehow still clever enough to make you question who’s really being trained. Spoiler - it’s probably you.

This Irish magic school setting hits different than the usual wizard academy bullshit. You're playing some loser who can't get laid to save his life, which honestly? Relatable as fuck. Five years at this fancy Tír na nÓg place and you've got nothing to show for it - no grades, no sports trophies, definitely no pussy. Your buddy Eric comes up with this brilliant idea to use some ancient spell to conjure up girlfriends, because apparently that's what passes for problem-solving in magical Ireland. The spell works, sort of, but there's always a catch with this old magic crap. Now you've got to actually earn your keep and climb the social ladder before you can claim your magical girlfriend prize.

The sandbox RPG mechanics let you wander around doing whatever the hell you want, which is nice because most of these school games railroad you through boring-ass storylines. You can focus on studying to boost your grades, hit the gym to get swole, or just chase after the various big-titted witches roaming the halls. The art style does justice to all the curvy magical babes you'll be pursuing - we're talking proper thicc witches with assets that defy both gravity and school uniform regulations. There's something satisfying about starting as the school's biggest nobody and gradually working your way up to actually matter. Though honestly, the pacing feels weird sometimes - one minute you're struggling with basic spells, next minute you're somehow important enough that hot sorceresses give a damn about you.

What really works here is how the game doesn't pretend you're some chosen one bullshit from day one. You earn every bit of respect and every piece of ass through actual effort, even if that effort involves magical shortcuts. The fantasy school setting gives you plenty of excuses to explore different kinks and scenarios without things getting too repetitive. Sure, it's not the most original premise, but when you're balls deep in a redheaded witch who's teaching you "advanced wand techniques," originality becomes less of a priority.

This thing absolutely feels like the result of someone horny, bored and a bit too obsessed with Harry Potter porn on Xvideos, in the best and worst way. You play a male wizard tossed back to some weird 70s version of magic school, and everything has that “almost familiar but off” vibe. It’s clearly Hogwarts but also legally not Hogwarts and that actually makes it hotter somehow. The school corridors are all quiet and soft lit, plenty of little corners where you can just stop and peek at stuff you’re not supposed to see. The first time I followed one witch after curfew, I was just clicking around for a random event and suddenly I’m spying through a keyhole while she’s practicing “magic focus” with a dildo the size of a wand, panting into a pillow. That voyeur moment hit harder than half the porn I have saved on my phone. And then the game acts like it’s your fault for watching too long. Which is accurate, honestly.

The teasing is where it really got me. It doesn’t rush right into sex unless you deliberately brute-force it. Witches will lean just a bit too close during classes, robes slip open a few pixels too far, they bend down to pick up books and the camera angle is just perfectly trashy. I liked how one girl pretends to be all strict and dominant, scolding you for not paying attention, then “punishes” you in a private tutoring session by making you kneel and focus while she slowly wraps her tits around your cock. No background music, just her breathing and a couple of quiet voice lines, and you can choose to either obey or grab her waist and break the mood. I picked obey, obviously. Or maybe not, now that I think back. Anyway the titfuck scene is surprisingly emotional for something that also made me pause my Spotify because it was getting distracting. The writing swings from horny jokes to soft romance to lowkey bullying in a way that feels like scrolling through Reddit gone wrong. One moment you’re testing some charm, next moment she’s using that spell to tie your hands magically while she rides you, talking trash in your ear, completely in charge. People looking for pure vanilla might complain, but honestly the femdom flavor fits the whole witch fantasy. The only thing that annoyed me is how sometimes you spend way too long clicking every shiny thing in a classroom just to trigger a single groping animation, and then it’s over in ten seconds. I still kept doing it. I hate myself a little for that.

The “sandbox” part is strange but kind of addictive. You wander around the school, poke at random magical crap, and every now and then you unlock a new scene or a tiny quest. There was this moment where I found a cursed mirror hidden behind some dusty curtains and instead of a jumpscare or something, it showed a witch undressing in another room in real time, touching herself with a wand between her legs while you choose to watch longer or back off. Of course I watched longer. It felt like one of those shitty porn pop-up ads made into an actual game mechanic. The parody humor hits and misses: some spell names are intentionally stupid, like a charm that “helps circulation” and is just an excuse for a handjob in the infirmary, with the nurse slowly stroking you while complaining about school regulations. The tone jumps around a lot. One witch is written like a proper romance route, with soft moments in the library, holding hands, kissing in the courtyard after class, then she surprises you with a blowjob under the table while a teacher is talking, trying not to laugh as you struggle to keep eye contact. Another witch is basically chaos with a wand, turning your clothes invisible in public, using toys on herself in the dorm while she forces you to stay on lookout at the door. I kept thinking I would get tired of the point and click parts, but then some little animated gesture or facial reaction would drag me right back in. It’s messy, horny, a bit broken in pacing, and the romance is twisted in that way where you end up wanting these girls to obsess over you forever. Which is probably not healthy, but alright.