This thing is basically fanfiction that got drunk and horny and forgot what “respecting the source material” means. You’re Fafnir, yeah, that grumpy dragon nerd, but here he’s not just hoarding games. He’s hoarding control. You’re poking into the bodies and minds of the girls from Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid and then some extras from other shows too, like someone left the multiverse door open and you just wandered in with a curse book. The vibe is: visual novel, click through scenes, pick a line, watch the girls slowly stop being themselves and start being exactly what your pervy little dragon brain wants. It uses AI CG so sometimes a shot looks almost too pretty and then you notice a weird finger or strange angle and your brain goes “huh” for half a second before going right back to staring at thighs. It’s messy, but in a way that kinda fits a curse story. Nothing here feels gentle. You’re not romancing, you’re breaking people down and repainting them inside their own heads, and if that sounds fucked up… yeah, it is. The game knows it, and it doesn’t really care.

The mind control stuff is not subtle at all. You curse, you tweak, you watch them crack. Tohru trying to stay loyal to Kobayashi while your influence slides into her thoughts is lowkey the best part. She’s smiling, saying her normal cute maid lines, but the text starts sneaking in things like her clenching her thighs or her hands hovering too long on places she shouldn’t touch. She tells herself she’s doing it for Kobayashi, serving her better, but it’s obvious she’s being rewired into your perfect toy. There’s a scene where you push her to “practice” seduction so she can surprise Kobayashi later, but every choice is actually making her more addicted to your magic and less able to say no. It’s twisted and horny and kind of pathetic, in a good way. Then you jump over to Kanna and the tone whiplash hits. She’s smaller, cuter, and the game leans hard into teasing and “innocent” obedience that is absolutely not innocent. She starts out pouting and stubborn, and after some curse adjustments she’s just quietly doing what you say, blushing and asking if she was “a good girl” while you mess with her body like you’re tuning a character in a creator app. I honestly spend too long just staring at how the lighting hits her legs in one CG and got annoyed because there’s this tiny artifact on her knee I couldn’t unsee. Still clicked through, obviously. Then you’ve got stuff with Power randomly showing up like someone mashed Chainsaw Man into the wrong folder, and instead of fixing it the dev just rolled with it. She’s loud, rude, and super easy to corrupt, which fits weirdly well. She hates being told what to do, so naturally the curse turns her into the kind of girl who begs to be ordered around, and by the time she’s grinding on a chair because you told her she can’t touch herself yet, she’s basically a dog chasing its own tail.

The best part is when the game pretends it’s about romance for a few lines. Fafnir suddenly gets almost poetic with Makoto Takiya, talking about “human attachment” while he’s literally using curse magic to make the girls obsess over him. It reads like those cringy Discord DMs where someone tries to sound deep before sending a dick pic. There’s also a running thing with sexual harassment that is just treated as normal here. You tell them to “act more friendly” and the next scene they’re rubbing against you in public, clothes riding up, people around kind of existing but not really mattering. The choices are often like: “push her further,” “push her even further,” or “pretend to be gentle while pushing her further anyway.” No moral out. Not even pretending. The parody angle is strong in how it pulls characters from everywhere and shoves them in the same cursed sandbox, but it never slows down to explain the lore properly, which I kinda liked. It feels like browsing a bunch of horny Twitter fanart threads at once, except here you get to decide exactly how broken their minds end up. And sometimes the CG glitches a bit or the proportions look a bit off, but that almost makes it feel more like some forbidden game you shouldn’t be playing, instead of polished merch. I tried screenshotting a scene with Tohru kneeling, looking up, her eyes half-gone from the spell, and my capture app lagged right at the good frame. Still mad about that.

Konosuba: The Harem Adventures feels like someone took the original anime, spilled horny fanfic all over it, then decided, “yeah, this is fine” and clicked publish. You wake up as the usual unlucky dumbass hero in Axel, tossed into another world where monster girls want to kill you, then ride you, then maybe both at the same time. The game pretends to be about quests and turn based combat and all that, but everyone knows why your mouse is hovering over Aqua’s tits instead of the “attack” button. Half the time you’re joking with her about her useless goddess act, then the next scene she is on her knees, drool on her chin, eyes rolled back in perfect ahegao while you think, “yeah, this is exactly what she deserves.” The writing leans into the humiliation, the teasing, the whole “she’s divine but still choking on your dick” thing without blinking. It is not subtle. It is not trying to be.

Then there is Darkness, who looks like a walking BDSM fantasy and acts like someone switched her brain with a masochistic attack dog. The game really plays with that. You pick a “normal” romantic answer and she somehow twists it into “please degrade me more.” During combat she is supposed to be your tank, taking hits from monsters, but the game keeps cutting to little animations where she is basically cumming from pain, armor sliding off, ass taking up half the screen. It is funny at first, then hot, then slightly pathetic, which is also kind of hot if you are honest. And in town, when you go into the more sandbox parts, you can push her a bit further every time: a “training” session that starts with standard handjob and ends in anal with her begging you to hit her harder, while the scene keeps that goofy Konosuba humor. It never lets you forget this is a parody, but it also doesn’t shy away from being straight up filthy. Same with Megumin: she is obsessed with explosions, obviously, but here her climax is treated like a literal blast, with the build up in combat turning into sexual build up in her private events, including a scene where she has you pinned, riding you with this unhinged grin, moaning about “releasing it all at once” like she is talking about magic. The game knows exactly what it is doing.

Outside the main trio, the game broadens into pure harem chaos. There is the milf innkeeper who looks like she walked out of some cheap porn ad on the side of a pirate site, but her scenes are shockingly tender for a game that also gives you a succubus who basically turns you into a walking cum dispenser if you are not careful with your choices. The succubus events are surprisingly mechanical too, tied to your combat progress and “energy” in a way that can really screw your runs if you let her drain you dry in one of those animated footjobs or slow, teasing oral sessions where she pretends she is doing you a favor. There is light incest teasing from one of the new girls that made me roll my eyes, because it goes right to that line and dances on it longer than needed, but the game clearly knows its audience and doesn’t apologize. Some routes feel like a dating sim with actual romance, some like pure porn logic, and sometimes the same girl flips between genuine warmth and cartoonish ahegao in the span of one conversation. It can be whiplash. Still, the mix of teasing, exhibitionism in town events, and little scenes where the male protagonist is clearly still a virgin at heart trying to act like a harem king gives it this strange, almost honest undercurrent. He is not a noble hero, he is just a horny isekai loser who somehow ended surrounded by big tits, big asses, a few monster girls, and way too many chances to make the worst possible choice. Which, to be fair, is kind of the point.

I don’t know who came up with the idea to mash Makima, Zelda, and Tsunade into the same world, but whoever it was probably spilled beer on their keyboard halfway through writing the script - and that’s what makes *D20 Magic Dice* feel alive. It’s messy, horny, strangely sentimental at times, like watching late-night anime reruns after a breakup. You’re talking to this dice thing (yeah, an actual dice), and before you even realize it, it’s making your thoughts real. Not just the good ones. I rolled a 3 once and ended up in some half-lit tavern where Widowmaker was arm wrestling Rumi for no reason while Zelda flirted with the bartender. I think I lost track of the main plot two minutes in, but it didn’t matter. The game doesn’t care either, it just keeps throwing beautiful chaos in your lap, all soft skin and heavy breathing mixed with dumb jokes about mana points.

What I liked most is how it doesn’t pretend to be clever. The dialogue’s sometimes broken, and the pacing jumps like old VHS tape - one second you’re teasing Ada Wong, next second Tsunade’s lecturing you about responsibility while sitting on your lap. There’s some strange comfort in that inconsistency. I did wish there were more sound options though; moans hit too loud compared to everything else, made me lower volume quick before neighbors got curious. And yet, when Makima whispers in that weirdly calm tone, you kinda forgive every bug. Maybe nostalgia blinds me - I grew up on janky flash hentai crossovers, and this feels like one resurrected from 2009. The dice mechanic almost feels secondary to the conversations, which twist between sincere and absurd so fast it makes you laugh mid-erection.

Sometimes I forget which universe I’m even in - Naruto? Overwatch? Who cares. The worlds blur, the clothes vanish, and someone says something about destiny while you’re trying not to roll another damn six. Three words? Chaotic, filthy, affectionate. Dare to play it alone, or invite company?

I didn’t expect to laugh this much during what’s basically a porn game about rebuilding civilization with your dick, but here we are. “Dickcare” doesn’t even pretend to have subtlety, which somehow makes it better. It’s like the dev looked at every crossover hentai fantasy - Velma squinting behind foggy glasses, Raven pretending she’s not into it, Tatsumaki rolling her eyes while secretly moaning - and said, yeah, let’s just throw them all in one ruined world and call it salvation. The writing’s half self-aware and half deranged sincerity; the voice lines swing between awkwardly horny and genuinely funny. There’s one scene with Frankie in a busted gym locker room that made me pause, not because it was hot (though it is), but because she calls you “hero” in this weird soft tone right before things get messy. It stays in your head longer than expected.

What’s wild is how much *sound* adds to everything. You can tell someone cared about the way a zipper slides down or the slap echoing off concrete walls. The sandbox part? Looser than it sounds. You wander, talk, get distracted by some zombie side plot that doesn’t matter, and suddenly Velma’s stuck halfway through a ventilation shaft. It’s ridiculous, yeah, but also... kind of perfect. There’s no grind, no fake moral choice. Just dirty, absurd freedom. Though, I swear one moaning loop cuts off too early - it’s such a small glitch but now I obsess over it. Maybe that’s the point: perfection would ruin the charm.

It’s funny how a game full of cum jokes and cartoon parodies ends up feeling more alive than most serious stuff. Maybe because it doesn’t care if you take it seriously. One minute you’re saving humanity, next you’re wiping something off Raven’s cape while she pretends not to blush. If there were awards for “Most Unnecessarily Emotional Cum Scene,” this one wins without competition.