Mystery Inc rolling up to some random Dutch castle already sounds cheap and horny, and this game doesn’t even pretend to be classy. Velma gets thrown right in as the brainy monster hunter who somehow keeps losing more clothes every time a “bizarre creature” jumps out. The tone is this messy mix of Saturday morning cartoon and late-night porn tab you forgot to close on Chrome. You’re clicking through these little scenes where she’s trying to “analyze” slime samples and weird footprints, but let’s be honest, the monsters are just lining up to fill her up. There’s a big focus on cumshots and creampies, and the game actually leans into it instead of cutting away. When one of those big ugly bastards finally pins Velma and she’s squirming in that half-ripped orange sweater, the camera just stays there on the moment it all spills deep inside her. No classy fadeout, no clever joke, just thick white mess and a nerd girl breathing hard like she’s trying to do math in her head and failing. It’s filthy in a very direct way that I weirdly liked. On my phone with Chrome and on Edge on my old laptop it ran the same, just occasional lag when the monster finishes and the white stuff keeps layering up. I actually thought my browser froze during one of the castle corridor scenes, but it was just the animation looping slightly awkward. Kind of charming, kind of annoying.

Daphne shows up as the redhead distraction, like usual, but they crank her into almost bimbo mode. Half the time she’s talking about “feeling a strange energy” and the other half she’s bending over for no reason at all while something with claws and glowing eyes watches from the shadows. There’s a funny bit where she’s trying to act like some pro monster slayer, but the “plan” is obviously just her getting grabbed and used. She gets those full-body shudders when a monster finishes inside her, and the game holds on her face when she realizes it’s not just on her skin, it’s dripping out of her. The pregnancy risk vibes are strong even though nothing is spelled out, especially with how the camera keeps going back to stretched, used holes and that slow leak of cum. It’s not subtle. I went in expecting more actual mystery, like some real Scooby Doo unmasking where the monster is an old dude in a suit, but nope, these are straight-up monsters who fuck, and everyone just kind of accepts it. It’s funny, because the story pretends to be serious, but the pacing is just sex scene, quick line of “investigation”, then more sex. Still, I liked how the castle itself feels like a horny maze of traps, ruined halls, and secret rooms where Velma is suddenly on her knees with a huge shadow over her. I kept wishing there was a proper build-up scene where they all sit in the van talking about their plan, but the game just throws you right into the cursed sex dungeon vibe and never really explains why these girls are this into monster cock. Or maybe it does and I just clicked too fast because the next creampie was loading. Either way, it sticks in your head like some weird wet dream you’re slightly embarrassed to remember later, when you open your browser history and see that dumb castle again.

This thing is pure horny cartoon chaos, in the best and worst way at same time. You open it, and boom, Jessica is already there like she owns your screen, tits basically defying gravity, dress painted on her body so tight you can almost hear the zipper crying. She gives you that lazy, “I know you’re gonna be a slut for me” look, and yeah, she’s right. The whole vibe is like someone mashed up old-school ToonTown with a Pornhub search for “redhead with ridiculous boobs” and then said, “yeah, let’s make her fuck a rabbit, why not.” There is no romance here, baby, it’s just cartoon meat show. One second she’s posing like a pin-up queen, the next you’re dragging that shiny dress off piece by piece, and it feels kinda wrong but also very, very correct. I loved how the game lets you linger on her body as long as you want, but also I hated it, because I kept clicking the same spot by accident on my phone and it kept skipping ahead. Still clicked again though. Obviously.

Once she’s naked, the whole tone shifts from “ha-ha fun parody” to “oh damn, this is actual hardcore porn but with a rabbit.” Roger looks like he has no idea how he got this lucky, like he tripped and fell straight into OnlyFans. The first actual action moment that made me laugh out loud: Jessica dropping down in front of him, grabbing those bunny hips, and just stuffing that long white cartoon cock straight into her throat like she’s clocking in for work. No build up, no romance, just *schlurp*. The deepthroat animation goes wild, her throat bulging, mascara vibes, spit all over, and she keeps eye contact with you, not him, which is such a little dirty detail. She’s not swallowing for Roger, she’s swallowing for the viewer, full pornstar energy. The cumshot is rude in a fun way, too, like the game is winking at you: you think it’s gonna be a little drip, then suddenly her whole face is glazed like a Krispy Kreme. I was half cheering, half thinking, okay girl, you need a towel and a tetanus shot.

And then the riding starts and things get a little unhinged. She climbs on that rabbit and the camera practically worships her ass, big and bouncy like it’s got its own physics engine, even though this whole thing is super simple. She switches from grinding on his cock nice and slow to just pounding herself down like she’s trying to break the poor animal in half. Pussy, ass, everything on the menu, no shy angles, you get full views of penetration that look dirty and goofy at the same time, because hello, that is still a rabbit. There’s this one moment where you can see his dumb happy face in the corner while she’s bouncing away like a rodeo queen, and I actually had to pause, open Twitter, and type “I am watching a rabbit wreck Jessica Rabbit’s holes and I’m okay with this.” I wasn’t, but that’s between me and my browser history. The game is short, trashy, and kinda janky in spots, but honestly that just makes it feel more like some cursed Newgrounds relic you’d find hidden in an old folder labeled “homework.” It’s wrong. It’s hot. It’s stupid. I replayed the facial twice.

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Get ready for a wild tale where you play as one of a pair of sisters. Living together in a cramped apartment, you and your sister Haley, everything seems ideal on the surface - yet appearances are about to shatter. The tension builds because there’s a serious problem: you can't stand Haley's boyfriend.

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