You’re this bored nineteen-year-old stuck in the middle of nowhere, on a farm that smells like shit and hay, with a body that’s way too awake for that kind of sleepy village life. The game takes that feeling of “I’m done with this crap” and throws you into a countryside full of curves, gossip, and that quiet kind of pervy energy you only get when everyone pretends to be innocent but fucks behind barns. It starts small: you click around the yard, poke at the usual stuff, talk to the locals. Then you realize half the “normal” farm chores turn into excuses to stare at huge tits bouncing while someone bends over to pick up a bucket. The animations are simple but they move just enough that when one of the older women leans in to explain something, your brain stops listening to her words and locks on the way her boobs press against her shirt.

The whole point and click thing actually fits the vibe. You aren’t some big hero. You’re just a horny farm kid poking his nose in the wrong places. You’re fixing fences outside, collecting eggs, feeding animals, but at the same time you’re checking out who’s masturbating behind the shed when they think no one’s watching. I had this moment where I clicked on the wrong path behind the house, thought it was a useless dead end, then caught one of the MILF characters out in the field, legs apart, skirt pushed up, hand buried between her thighs, breathing heavy. No dialogue option, just you watching like a creep, and her half-knowing you’re there but pretending she doesn’t. That scene stuck with me more than any “in your face” porn. You’re not handed everything. You kind of stumble into it, like a pervert tourist in his own village.

The dating parts are funny because everyone pretends it’s “just talking” while they stand in front of you with massive tits barely contained in their tops. You bring gifts, do tasks, run small errands around the village, and slowly they open up, ask personal stuff, start flirting. Or insult you. One of them shot me down so hard I almost alt-tabbed out to scroll Twitter instead. Then later, after a few more days in game, suddenly she’s leaning over a fence, nipples poking through her thin shirt while she pretends she didn’t do that on purpose. The game is kind of janky too. Sometimes you click on a thing and nothing happens, or time skips weirdly, or you walk around the same field three times just to trigger one new scene. It annoyed the hell out of me, especially when I was stuck trying to figure out who needed help on the farm and the hint system just said something useless like “Explore the village.” Thanks, I guess?

But the countryside vibe, the mix of slow life and slow burn horny build-up, really works. You’re wandering between barns, old houses, and dirt roads, with the sun on everything and that sense that behind every door there’s someone with big boobs doing something they shouldn’t be doing where anyone could see. Some girls are shy, some are blunt, some treat you like a kid until you catch them outside, alone, breathless and flushed, and the whole mood flips. You get those little animated loops in sexier moments, bodies grinding against old wooden walls or pressed into the grass, clothes half off because who has time to undress fully when your cock is already hard. The farm itself never really stops being present. You’ll be in the middle of flirting and still see tools, hay, fields in the background, which makes it feel kinda dirty and real at the same time. It’s not polished, sometimes it feels clumsy, sometimes hot as hell, but it keeps pulling you back to see which villager finally stops pretending and lets you fuck them out in the open where anyone could walk by.

RuleUniverse feels like someone mashed Dragon Ball fanfiction, horny Twitter art and a half-finished Ren’Py project, then accidentally made it kind of addictive. You start as this lonely overachiever kid that reads like every shonen protagonist in history, then a demon scientist pops up and says, “hey, let’s stuff your body with DNA from the strongest fighters in the universe, what could go wrong.” It’s delightfully stupid in that fanfic way, but precisely because of that, it works. The game knows it’s a parody, it doesn’t try to pretend it’s “deep”, and then it suddenly throws in a line about destiny or guiding the universe and you’re like… alright, Toriyama-with-horny-mods, calm down.

The real fun is how transparently it worships its women. Bulma, Chi-Chi, Android 18, that whole legendary boob-and-ass pantheon is here, clearly shaped by someone who grew up pausing VHS at the worst places. The models are 3D and exaggerated as hell: huge tits, fat asses, those shiny anime lips that just scream “she’s going to suck him off in like two clicks.” Animated scenes actually move, not just two stiff characters rubbing like broken Sims; you get thrusting, jiggling, drool, that soft spit string when you pull out from a blowjob, all the little pervy details that tell you the dev really wanted this for themselves first. One moment you’re doing basic combat with ki blasts and energy auras, the next you’re balls-deep in Bulma in a lab, with wires and science junk in the background like that somehow makes it ethical. And the combat’s funny: it pretends to be serious, but all you’re thinking is “okay, how many fights until I unlock the next sex scene with Android 18.” Sometimes the sandbox part feels less like a “world” and more like a small playground with a fence around it, but the loops of walking around, clicking, triggering small events, slowly unlocking more lewd stuff… it scratched that same spot as old flash games I used to sneak at school on shitty browsers.

I kinda love how messy it is. The romance tries to act sentimental for a second, then five lines later you’re face-fucking a milf with magic powers while she moans like someone recorded it in a bathroom on a cheap mic. Dialog swings from “I will guide the universe” to “fuck me harder” without the slightest shame. Exploration is simple, a little repetitive, but I still kept wandering, poking every corner hoping there’s a hidden event where Chi-Chi finally snaps and rides the protagonist like he’s the last Saiyan on earth. Some text sounds like it was written at midnight by a dude half-remembering DBZ arcs from YouTube AMVs, which, honestly, is the right energy. I do wish the world reacted more to what you do, like if you bang Bulma enough, Vegeta starts showing up mad or something, but I know that kind of feature is exactly the thing that stays in the dev’s “maybe later” notes forever. Still, when you’re watching Android 18 slowly drop to her knees after you save her in a fight and she rewards you with this sloppy, animated blowjob, with her tits barely contained and that quiet smug smile when she swallows, it hits the trashy, horny, teen-power-fantasy nerve in a very specific way. It’s not elegant. It’s not smart. It’s like a wet doujin turned half-game, half-daydream, and somehow that’s exactly why it sticks.

Ayumi looks like that quiet girl on the bus you lowkey stare at and then pretend you didn’t, except here she’s a witch, futa, and basically public enemy number one. The whole thing starts with her already in deep shit, hiding in this creepy forest and trying not to get caught and burned, and I like that the game doesn’t baby you with long lore, it just throws you in the middle of her mess. One second you’re checking the trees for monsters, next second some huge-ass busty monster girl with claws is pinning you against a rock and sniffing you like you’re dinner and sex toy at same time. It’s survival but in a really horny, soft-brutal way. You’re trying to keep Ayumi alive, yeah, but also there’s this sick curiosity, like, ok, what happens if I actually lose here? And the game absolutely answers that. Sometimes too well. I opened this in another tab while pretending to type in Excel and instantly regretted not having a second monitor because the first corruption scene is way too obvious if someone walks by.

What caught me off guard is how Ayumi’s whole futa thing is treated. It’s just there. People care way more that she’s a witch than about the big cock between her legs. You get these scenes where she’s shaking from fear while some angry milf inquisitor is threatening to hurt her, and yeah, it’s intense, but at the same time you catch Ayumi getting turned on by it and you’re like girl, same, but also what the hell. There’s a corruption bar that keeps creeping up every time you let someone use her, or she masturbates when she should be hiding, or you pick the flirty option when a monster girl clearly wants to break her. I liked teasing the hell out of a certain tall, smug knight woman, having Ayumi act submissive and clingy in the dialogues, then flipping on a later route and watching Ayumi shove her against a wall and fuck her like some desperate pervert who finally snapped. The harem side grows kind of naturally, too. You start with one “ally” who is basically manipulating her, then suddenly you realize you’re half roleplaying a romance thread, half grooming your own yandere energy. I had Ayumi obsess hard on this one witch hunter with big ass and cruel smile, visiting her in scenes even when it was a bad idea, just because I wanted to see what new way she’d humiliate Ayumi this time.

The sandbox stuff is messy but in a way I kinda like. You wake up in camp, or a ruined church, or some weird forest shrine, and you decide if Ayumi goes gather herbs, sneak into town where everyone hates witches, or “check on” some girl she’s fixated on. I spent way too long just having her stalk the same milf innkeeper, watching the slow shift from awkward virgin energy to straight up sexual harassment. You talk to her, get gently rejected, then come back corrupted a bit more and suddenly your dialogue choices tilt into creepy, touching her hand too long, sniffing, staring at her cleavage, and the game doesn’t stop you. It punishes you later, kind of, but not enough to make you stop. One moment that stuck with me: Ayumi hiding behind barrels, watching two women in the bath, clearly lovers, and you can choose if she just watches and masturbates quietly or uses magic to “nudge” them, make them more rough, more needy, like she’s directing her own porn. I went full perv with the mind screw, and later when she actually meets one of them face to face, the girl acts different, broken in a subtle way, and Ayumi smiles this tiny fucked up smile. It’s hot and also a bit sick. I wish the game let Ayumi go full obsessive yandere faster, but maybe it’s better it teases it slow. If you play, don’t rush the main plot. Linger on the small scenes, the teasing, the failed escapes, the awkward handjobs given in exchange for “protection” that never really protects anything. Always push Ayumi a bit further than you think is safe. That’s where the good shit happens.

Ravenhollow looks like one of those villages you’d scroll past on Instagram gothcore feed, then zoom in because the girl in the background has dead eyes and huge tits. The game throws you there as this kinda awkward scientist guy, full of theory and not enough pussy, who honestly feels like he belongs more on Reddit than in a cursed forest. You’re supposed to be all “serious researcher” writing a thesis about monsters and anomalies, but ten minutes in you’re juggling notes about vampire behavior and trying not to stare at a werewolf girl’s bouncing ass while she pretends not to notice. The tone is really funny in that mean, sarcastic way, characters talk shit, tease you nonstop, and then suddenly you’re balls deep in a forest nymph and your noble academic career is over. In the best way. Sort of.

The star for me is Viernes13. She looks like Wednesday Addams if Wednesday had way more curves and zero patience. Black dress, straight hair, that bored goth stare that looks right through you like you’re already disappointing her. Her whole vibe screams “I know all the secrets here and I also know you’re horny and weak.” The game plays with that hard. First time she takes you into the forest, she talks about this thing called the Heart of Lugrenwald like it’s a scientific site, but she keeps brushing your arm on purpose, pausing a bit too long when she leans close, and you can literally feel the moment the “field study” turns into “ok, I’m gonna milk this nerd.” The teasing is slow, like she enjoys making you squirm, then suddenly she has her hand in your pants and you forget you were trying to measure anomalous energy. There is a blowjob scene by the dark trees where she keeps eye contact the entire time and it’s actually kinda unsettling and hot. Also her tits look soft but heavy as fuck, like they would actually hurt your face in a good way.

What surprised me is the combat and management parts don’t feel like lazy excuse. You have turn-based fights in the forest and around the village, but half the time it feels like flirting as combat. Some girls transform mid-battle, like a shapeshifter girl that gets more naked and more monstrous the more turns pass, and your brain has to choose between “wow, strategy” and “wow, I’d let her sit on my face even if she eats me after.” You collect stuff, give them as gifts, plan dates, manage your time like some cursed horny calendar. I got stuck one evening trying to min-max affection values for a big-ass vampire lady, and I accidentally triggered a scene where she pins the protagonist to a coffin and just rides him raw, slow grind, heavy tits bouncing, and she keeps talking in this calm, old-timey way while you’re literally creampie machine for her. It kinda ruined me a bit. The sandbox feeling is nice but also annoying sometimes because the game doesn’t always tell you clearly what to do next, so you wander around Ravenhollow like a lost idiot with blue balls. Also the text on one menu button is just slightly off center and it drives me crazy every single time I open it. I keep noticing it. I hate it. Anyway, the AI CG actually looks good most of the time, faces have expression, cum stays where it should, and the animated loops are dirty without being too sterile. Some scenes feel romantic, soft kisses and slow vaginal sex under weird moonlight, then next moment a monster girl is drooling on your dick and using you like a toy. The whole thing feels like a horny gothic zoo where you are the one getting observed, not them, and honestly I’m kinda ok with that.