Creepy House feels like that one horny urban legend your buddy swears happened to his “cousin in another town”, except this time you actually get to click your way through it. You play this kinda screwed over dude fresh out of high school, stuck in community college hell, surrounded by boring people who think a haunted mansion is the scariest thing ever. Everyone in the neighborhood is all “don’t go near that place, it’s cursed” and obviously that just makes you walk right up and knock like you’re delivering Uber Eats to Satan. Door opens, and instead of some old man with a shotgun, you get hit in the face with pure goth chaos: deadpan stares, black lipstick, cold sarcasm, and more teasing than a TikTok thirst trap. It feels like falling into a bootleg Addams Family episode nobody told the lawyers about, in the best and worst way at the same time.

The house itself is like a horny theme park. Every room is set up for some new awkward situation where you’re trying to act normal while someone’s pale, stacked mom casually leans over a table and her tits are doing jump scares at you. The game keeps throwing you into these little adventure scenes where you’re picking what to say, pretending you’re not staring, and yeah, if you play it half-smart, ending up with a lot of very sloppy, very enthusiastic oral action. One moment you’re “helping” Wednesday-style goth girl study and the next she’s on her knees making eye contact like she’s sucking out your soul through your dick. They tease like crazy too, the kind of slow hand on the thigh, “oh you’re getting hard from this?” shit that makes you want to punch your own screen and say yes, obviously. There’s this milf who talks like she’s just being polite, but every line sounds like an invite to cheat on someone you don’t even have. It’s that weird mix of creepy and hot that kinda should not work, but it does, then sometimes it doesn’t, then it does again. The “horror” part is 90% vibes and outfits, but occasionally they toss in a little dark joke that makes you snort at the worst time, like right when something filthy is happening and you’re half trying to, you know, focus.

What actually got me was this dumb little extra thing: as you mess around in the mansion and get deeper into this horny fake Addams situation, you unlock pin-ups of other goth girls that are clearly inspired by every internet crush you’ve ever had. It’s like the dev had a folder named “do not open at work” and just dumped it into the game. I kept thinking “ok, one more scene and I’m done” and then suddenly I’m chasing some new teasing route because I wanted to see if the quiet girl in the hallway actually snaps and drags you into some hidden room for a “punishment” blowjob. And sometimes the pacing just falls on its face, like you’re ready for something filthy and the game makes you click through a bunch of dialog that feels like it escaped from a sitcom from the 90s, but then you hit a line that’s so petty or mean or strangely romantic that you kind of forgive it without noticing. It’s messy, horny, a bit broken in the head, and it absolutely leans into that fantasy of “everybody told you not to go to that house” and you went anyway, and your biggest problem now is choosing which goth girl is gonna ruin your GPA with her mouth.

There is this strange, heavy feeling when the game opens, like walking back into an old porn folder you forgot, but someone has replaced all cheap hentai with something that actually stares back at you. You are this ancient thing, Iraáil, a vampire god-thing, whatever, but tired as fuck. Not the sexy edgy teen vampire tired, more like “I’ve seen too much blood and too much bad sex and I’m bored of both” tired. The game sits you in that mood right away. You’re not chasing girls in school uniforms, you’re walking into the ruins of your own family, and everyone in it either wants to fuck you, kill you, or cry when they see you, sometimes all three in same scene. The writing leans hard into that mix of horny and awful. One moment you are licking blood off someone’s throat while their lover watches and shakes, half terrified, half desperate to be next, and the text lingers on the taste, the smell, the way their body softens under you. Then, in the next line, it hits you with “this is your child’s descendant” and suddenly your dick and your conscience are in the same small coffin.

What got me is how the erotic scenes never feel like they are in a separate folder from the rest. You make a small choice, like putting a hand on a shoulder instead of around the throat, and three scenes later someone is either on their knees for you, or sobbing and calling you a monster while still grinding against your leg. The game keeps score in this weird fear and love way, but it never throws a big popup, it just quietly warps how people look at you. There was this one moment where I chose to be “gentle” with a worshiper in a temple, just to see what the soft option looks like. It still ended in cum and blood on the floor, but the whole vibe flipped. Instead of them begging you to hurt them more, they were whispering that they missed you, like some fucked up immortal ex, and I actually paused, alt tabbed to Spotify, changed the playlist, came back and just stared at the text like “why am I sad with my pants down.” And the horror parts, they are not jumpscares, more like that slow “oh, I really did those things, huh” realization. When your progeny strips for you, showing bite marks you gave generations ago like holy scars, it’s hot in that dirty, stomach twisting way. You want to click further, you also want to close the browser and go touch grass. But you don’t. You pretend you will be kinder this time, then pick the cruel dialogue anyway, just to see how deep the rabbit hole of this fucked up immortal soap opera goes. The game remembers. The characters remember. Their bodies remember you most of all.

This one feels like somebody took all those dumb horror movies you watch on Netflix when you are too tired to think, ripped them apart, and then glued the pieces back together with sex and bad decisions. You get this small group of five walking clichés, but in a good way: the jock with more muscle than brain, the nerd who overthinks everything, the “good girl” who pretends she never masturbates, the wild party chick with tits that should have their own Discord server, and that one brooding guy/girl that clearly has problems and looks hot because of it. All stuck around a lonely cabin in the woods, with shit going on outside and inside at the same time. Classic “we shouldn’t be here” energy, except here you are literally rewarded for pushing them into the worst possible choices. And sex. A lot of sex in very wrong places.

What I really liked is how the game lets you jump heads. One moment you are inside the male protagonist’s brain, watching him try to play hero while secretly wondering how fast he can get his dick wet. Next moment you switch to the shy girl and her internal monologue is like “this is dangerous, we should stay together” while your mouse is guiding her alone into the dark corridor in a transparent tank top with no bra. It has that choose-your-own-adventure feeling I had as kid, but now instead of “turn to page 32 if you open the door”, it’s “click here to make her suck his cock while something moves in the shadows behind them.” Sometimes you even know it is a terrible idea, but the game kind of smiles at you and goes “yeah, do it anyway.” The horror stuff creeps in slowly. You might start with simple teasing, a blowjob on the couch while the others “sleep”, or two characters pressed against the cabin wall, her huge ass bouncing while she tries to stay quiet because there is noise outside. Then later the same wall has scratches, blood, and suddenly that earlier scene looks way more fucked up in hindsight. The antagonist is not just some random monster. It feels like it enjoys watching them fuck up, like a DM in a tabletop game who is a little bit horny and a little bit evil. There is this one moment in the woods where you can choose to keep fingering the girl against a tree, even after you already noticed something breathing near you. That choice felt nasty in the best way.

The sex is not soft. It fits the horror angle, rough and messy, people grabbing, biting, choking a bit, pushing faces down, messy oral where you can see spit strings and hear gurgling, that kind of thing. Big tits are not just decoration, the camera is obsessed with them, bouncing, getting grabbed too hard, slapped, pushed together around a cock. Same with asses, especially when the cabin lights are low and you only see the curve of her hips and his hands holding her like she is going to run away. Sometimes the game goes too much into “everyone is always horny” mode and you kind of forget there is danger, until suddenly it reminds you with a scream or a creepy shot outside the window and you think “ok yeah we’re dying here.” I actually got annoyed one time because a pretty tense scene in the woods stopped just so two characters could start fucking against a tree, but then I kept clicking anyway, so I guess I am the problem. The story tries to be serious, sometimes even emotional, and then two clicks later you have a dick in a mouth and someone crying in fear and pleasure mixed up, and it somehow works. Or maybe it doesn’t, and that’s exactly why it sticks in your head for too long after you close the browser.

Jake comes crawling back home with his life completely fucked, and the house basically looks at him like “oh, you thought you were done with us?” The place is out on the edge of nowhere, quiet in that wrong way, where the shadows feel like they’re paying attention. His “family” is there, but they’re not really how he remembers them. The milf who used to worry if he wore a scarf outside is suddenly dressing like she knows exactly how her tits bounce when she leans over his bed. The cute sister-type who used to steal his hoodies now “forgets” to wear pants in the hallway. Everybody’s acting normal and absolutely not normal at the same time. They smile too long. They touch him too casually. They say things that sound caring and then twist right at the end and feel like a threat. Or a promise. Hard to tell with a hard-on.

What makes it hit different is how the erotic stuff is tangled into the horror, not on top of it. One moment Jake is staring at a door that keeps closing itself, hearing breathing on the other side. The next he’s in the bathroom, and the milf is in there already, towel slipping, water dripping down those ridiculous heavy tits, and she just watches him watch her. No “oops, I didn’t hear you come in.” Just silent eye contact and the smallest smirk, like she’s waiting for him to break first. Then later you find out she’s hiding something way worse than a horny mood. A phone he didn’t know she had. Recordings she shouldn’t have. Angry texts from some unknown number that knows exactly where he sleeps and who he’s been touching. There’s blackmail threads crawling through the whole house, everybody has dirt on everybody, and the game likes to tease you with “ok, you can say no here” right when your cock is already screaming yes. And if you push into the more fucked up paths, the netorare and corruption bits hit pretty heavy. Watching the girl you’ve been quietly obsessing over get bent open by something not exactly human, eyes rolled back in full ahegao while you’re forced to watch or even help, is the kind of scene that stays in your head when you’re trying to scroll Twitter later and pretend you’re normal. Some of the supernatural stuff really leans into that: hands that look like yours touching her first, voices in her ear that sound like you telling her to open wider, a futanari “relative” that suddenly shows up in certain branches with a cock that absolutely ruins whoever she gets her hands on. There is one scene where you’re sneaking through the hall at night and catch the milf on all fours in front of a door that should be locked, getting railed by something you can barely see, and when she looks back, her face is half hers, half something else, drool and tears and total sex-drunk ahegao, and she still whispers your name instead of the monster’s. That shit is messed up and hot at the same time, which feels illegal but here we are.

What I kinda love and kinda hate is how petty some of the choices feel. You’re thinking “ok, I’m going to solve this paranormal mystery” and then the game hits you with “do you peek at her showering again or not?” and it actually matters. You ignore her once and later she is cold as ice, you peek too often and the whole vibe becomes exhibitionist on purpose, like she starts leaving doors open just to see how far she can break you. There are lesbian scenes that show up only if you screw up a relationship so badly that the girls stop giving themselves to you and start fucking each other instead, and it lands more like a punishment than a reward. Kind of hurts in that good ntr way, like the game is laughing in your face, telling you “yeah, you had your chance.” The blackmail routes get properly nasty: one of my favorite messed up bits was finding a hidden folder on a laptop, opening a video and realizing it’s your girl being fucked while she keeps saying she’s only doing this so “he doesn’t leak the stuff about you.” Not sure if it’s more horny or humiliating, but I clicked replay like five times anyway. And then some endings flip everything, turning you from scared loser to the actual corrupt thing lurking in the house, twisting the women, parading them half-naked in the living room while anyone or anything can watch. I kept telling myself “ok, that’s too far” while still picking the dirtiest choice every time. My only real complaint is stupid: sometimes a text box covers the exact part of the animation I’m staring at, and it pisses me off more than the ghost stuff. I adjust the window, I click ahead too fast, I miss a line, then I have to backscroll like an idiot. Still, when the game hits one of those perfect horror-sex combos, like hearing scratching on the walls while the milf rides you so hard her tits slap against her chest and the light flickers and something is definitely watching from the corner, all that annoyance just sort of melts into “ok, one more scene, then I stop.” Which is a lie, obviously.